Phuket thai restaurant and sushi menu
Fast food news, reviews, and discussion
2008.06.15 19:41 Fast food news, reviews, and discussion
The /FastFood subreddit is for news, reviews, and discussions of fast food (aka quick-service), fast casual, and casual restaurants -- covering everything fast food from multinational chains, regional and local chains, independent and chain cafeterias and all-you-can-eat restaurants, independent and chain diners, independent hole-in-the-wall restaurants, convenience store and gas station prepared food, food trucks and food carts, the neighborhood taqueria, street vendors, etc.
2011.07.05 08:22 littlefield20 Beautiful Libertyville
2023.05.28 07:47 indianfoodincary Indian Food Near Me
Looking for delicious and authentic Indian food near me in cary, NC? Our restaurant has a wide variety of dishes to satisfy any craving. our menu has something for everyone. Check out our menu and experience the flavors of India and visit our website today https://urbanangeethi.com/
submitted by indianfoodincary to u/indianfoodincary [link] [comments]
2023.05.28 07:11 godmadetexas Fancy Indian restaurants?
I’m looking for a fancy Indian restaurant to host some friends from abroad for a dinner. I looked around pretty extensively on Google maps, all I see are hole-in-the-wall or stripmall restaurants. No doubt their food is good but I’m looking for a place with good ambience, and a wine list and hopefully a cocktail menu. We’re fine driving to the suburbs.
submitted by godmadetexas to boston [link] [comments]
2023.05.28 06:07 AllFoodPad 54th Street Menu & Prices
If you are searching for a memorable dining experience that will fill your heart with joy and your taste buds with tingles? Visit 54th Street Restaurant right away! This well-liked establishment, which is located in the center of culinary excess, is renowned for its delectable food and with their welcoming environment, and first-rate service. in this article i will provide you the latest menu with price of 54th Street. So if you want to know full menu with price of 54th Street restaurant keep reading and bookmark this page if you want to keep in touch with this restaurant menu and prices we have continuous look on their menu and their prices.
You can find a wide variety of dining options at 54th Street Restaurant that is suitable for any occasion or preference. This restaurant offers the ideal environment for any gathering, whether you’re planning a party with friends, a special dinner for two, or a family celebration. You can also select the setting that best suits your mood thanks to the roomy indoor seating, the inviting patio area, and the cozy booths.
submitted by AllFoodPad to insanelydelish [link] [comments]
You can find a wide variety of dining options at 54th Street Restaurant that is suitable for any occasion or preference. This restaurant offers the ideal environment for any gathering, whether you’re planning a party with friends, a special dinner for two, or a family celebration. You can also select the setting that best suits your mood thanks to the roomy indoor seating, the inviting patio area, and the cozy booths.
2023.05.28 05:40 lunaflorae Employee exams?
I started working in a kitchen two weeks ago and today I was informed that next week I would have to take a written test on my knowledge of the menu. The manager will schedule an exam day for me, where I'll either have to come in early or stay late to complete the test. When I first started working, I was given a binder full of recipes that I assumed were only to be used as a reference, but no, it's literally study material for the exam. In talking to my coworkers it seems that the test results determine the percentage of tips you get, and if you fail the exam then your tips will be negatively impacted. I should note it's a minimum wage job at a somewhat upscale chain restaurant.
Is this at all common practice? Is it normal, or is it an enormous red flag?
submitted by lunaflorae to antiwork [link] [comments]
Is this at all common practice? Is it normal, or is it an enormous red flag?
2023.05.28 04:38 PV_Pathfinder Waldo bars from late 90’s
In the mid/late 90’s there used to be #two# separate bars where Waldo Thai is currently located. One was The Village Inn (not affiliated with the breakfast joint), what was the other? When Swagger moved in, they knocked down the wall between and made it one big barestaurant.
Been doing pub crawl down Wornall every Memorial Day the last 25 years. Seen plenty of bars come and go in that time, but no one can remember the name of that second bar.
submitted by PV_Pathfinder to kansascity [link] [comments]
Been doing pub crawl down Wornall every Memorial Day the last 25 years. Seen plenty of bars come and go in that time, but no one can remember the name of that second bar.
2023.05.28 04:20 Junior_Button5882 Why Did Kitchen Nightmares End? The Show's Cancelation Explained
 | Gordon Ramsay's reality show Kitchen Nightmares was immensely popular when it debuted in 2007, so it came as a surprise when it wasn't renewed for season 8. The British celebrity chef received a lot of recognition for his intense approach to cooking and unmatched passion for his craft. Gordon's heated attitude in the kitchen brought an undeniable level of entertainment to the screen, as he used his expertise to help restaurants struggling to keep their doors open. submitted by Junior_Button5882 to kitchennightmarez [link] [comments] SCREENRANT VIDEO OF THE DAYClosePauseUnmuteCurrent Time 0:03/Duration 1:30Loaded: 9.32%Fullscreen While Gordon has a multitude of successful shows, Kitchen Nightmares featured restaurants that needed a makeover in terms of their menu, service, and staff. Instead of focusing on specific cooking techniques or ingredients, the award-winning chef used his knowledge to help eateries turn their businesses around. Attempting to save establishments from closing and living to see another day was Chef Ramsay's mission, but his goal was cut short when it all came to an end in 2014. RELATED:5 Reasons Why Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmare Is Iconic (5 Reasons Why It's Not) Gordon Ramsay Axed Kitchen NightmaresIt may come as a surprise, but Gordon himself is the one who decided to put Kitchen Nightmares on the chopping block. Typically, television networks dictate whether a show will be renewed based on ratings and viewership, but in this case, it was entirely up to the chef, and he had his reasons. According to Delish, Gordon reached his boiling point after one of the restaurants on Kitchen Nightmares made him want to walk away from the show entirely, and he realized he was done.Gordon didn't reveal which particular restaurant made him quit, but he did explain that he and the restaurant owner didn't see eye-to-eye, and he felt that the owner was taking advantage of customers at his ski resort. Dealing with someone in that capacity who wasn't listening to anything he had to say influenced his decision to cancel the show. They filmed for a week, and at the end of it, that was when the chef had his show-altering epiphany. The Revival Of Kitchen Nightmares Has The Potential To Be PerfectionKitchen Nightmares will be returning after almost a decade off the air, but the long hiatus may be the recipe for its future success. When the brutal chef decided to close the door on the popular show, he took a break for three years and came back with another hit show, 24 Hours to Hell and Back. If history is set to repeat itself, that means the revival of Kitchen Nightmares has the potential to be better than ever after taking nearly ten years to whip up a new take on an old classic. Of course, Gordon won't be without his signature attitude and brazen authority in the kitchen.At the time, canceling Kitchen Nightmares felt like the right thing to do, and it couldn't be coming back at a better time. Unlike Gordon's other reality shows, it won't be focused on the element of competition, which will be a great change of pace. Seeing restaurants struggling in these economically difficult times will give Kitchen Nightmares a fresh perspective, as Gordon tries to get them back on track. https://preview.redd.it/1lg7uff3xi2b1.png?width=848&format=png&auto=webp&s=fe9f85564b062500f1d8e82794d369bc33f013c5 |
2023.05.28 02:33 dzoey Offshore by the lake
Offshore has opened in the spot formerly occupaied by Clydes overlooking Lake Kittamaqundi. The decor is more open and brighter than Clydes and the view of the lake is quite pleasant.
The food is quite good. I had the vegan shrimp and grits and it was really good. I'm not vegan, but I felt like grits and I'm not a fan of shrimp so this was a good choice. The four large "shrimp" were deep fried and served on a bed of grits that covered half the plate. The other half was a lovely tomato based sauce that mixed well with the "shrimp" and grits.
My daughter didn't want a large meal so she ordered the fried calamari appetizer as her main course. It was a large bowl filled with fried calamari, baby octopi, and picked jalapeno rounds all breaded and fried to perfection. Even though it was listed as an appetizer she wound up taking half of it home because there was so much. It is served with two sauces, a tomato based sauce and a cream based sauce (remulade?). The calamari were cooked well, with just a hint of chew - just how we like them.
The only disappointment in the food was the bread basket. For $9, you get four large rolls, which in themselves were quite good. The rolls were of different types, I liked the cheddar the best, but the brioche were nothing to sneeze at. The disappointment was the Old Bay butter that they included with the bread. I get the nautical Maryland theme of the restaurant, and I'm a fan of Old Bay in general (fries, chicken, crab(dip)), but they dumped so much old bay into the butter that not only did it overpower the bread, it was too salty, detracting from the bread. Our waiter was kind enough to fetch some regular butter which worked much better.
The service was excellent. The waiter kept our glasses full, removed plates as needed, and brought the dessert menu all without us asking. He knew the menu and could answer questions about the dishes. I was impressed at how good the service was.
The total for two people (1 entree, 1 appetizer, 1 bread basket) with no alcohol was $60 pre-tip . That prices it similar to Food Market and possibly Lak (haven't been yet). I would give the nod to Food Market for the food, though Offshore's food is good, but Offshore has better ambience.
submitted by dzoey to HoCoFood [link] [comments]
The food is quite good. I had the vegan shrimp and grits and it was really good. I'm not vegan, but I felt like grits and I'm not a fan of shrimp so this was a good choice. The four large "shrimp" were deep fried and served on a bed of grits that covered half the plate. The other half was a lovely tomato based sauce that mixed well with the "shrimp" and grits.
My daughter didn't want a large meal so she ordered the fried calamari appetizer as her main course. It was a large bowl filled with fried calamari, baby octopi, and picked jalapeno rounds all breaded and fried to perfection. Even though it was listed as an appetizer she wound up taking half of it home because there was so much. It is served with two sauces, a tomato based sauce and a cream based sauce (remulade?). The calamari were cooked well, with just a hint of chew - just how we like them.
The only disappointment in the food was the bread basket. For $9, you get four large rolls, which in themselves were quite good. The rolls were of different types, I liked the cheddar the best, but the brioche were nothing to sneeze at. The disappointment was the Old Bay butter that they included with the bread. I get the nautical Maryland theme of the restaurant, and I'm a fan of Old Bay in general (fries, chicken, crab(dip)), but they dumped so much old bay into the butter that not only did it overpower the bread, it was too salty, detracting from the bread. Our waiter was kind enough to fetch some regular butter which worked much better.
The service was excellent. The waiter kept our glasses full, removed plates as needed, and brought the dessert menu all without us asking. He knew the menu and could answer questions about the dishes. I was impressed at how good the service was.
The total for two people (1 entree, 1 appetizer, 1 bread basket) with no alcohol was $60 pre-tip . That prices it similar to Food Market and possibly Lak (haven't been yet). I would give the nod to Food Market for the food, though Offshore's food is good, but Offshore has better ambience.
2023.05.28 02:28 EmeraldGirl Bromos- Why are you in the bad mom's club today?
Me first:
I'm sitting in a "nice enough" restaurant (not fancy, but not a diner) in leggings and a hoodie. I'm 3 jack & cokes in. Milkbreath is playing Nintendo in the seat next to me and is eating his way through every side dish on the menu. I'm completely ignoring him to be on reddit. I've had a day and I don't need the side-eye from Mr & Mrs Karen in the corner. I'll stack my plates, tip better than Karen, and generally not be a witch, thanks.
Your turn. It's probably the start of summer for most of us... why are you in the bad mom's club today?
submitted by EmeraldGirl to breakingmom [link] [comments]
I'm sitting in a "nice enough" restaurant (not fancy, but not a diner) in leggings and a hoodie. I'm 3 jack & cokes in. Milkbreath is playing Nintendo in the seat next to me and is eating his way through every side dish on the menu. I'm completely ignoring him to be on reddit. I've had a day and I don't need the side-eye from Mr & Mrs Karen in the corner. I'll stack my plates, tip better than Karen, and generally not be a witch, thanks.
Your turn. It's probably the start of summer for most of us... why are you in the bad mom's club today?
2023.05.28 02:17 nosnebbb One of the most difficult things
about being a feminine boy is the blatant gawking and social ostracism :(
In regards to the stares:
My anxieties activate when i feel eyes staring. Sure, it may be optimistic to assume they are in admiration, but years of working on being comfortable in my own body and self-acceptance (with the acknowledgment that not everyone will simply “see” me for me) have left me constantly weary of those who will liberally berate me — publicly and shamelessly.
In regards to being ostracized:
I currently work in the kitchen if a sushi restaurant and, of course, I have made better friendships with the women i work alongside. We are playful, caring, and constantly conversing about our lives. The dynamics between myself and the men, however, are starkly and drastically different. Although I am cordial with most of the men, there are obvious and unspoken walls between myself and them. Particularly because I work in a city that is characteristically conservative. With full transparency, however, several of the men are conversational and we engage in enjoyable small talk.
I was aware that the culinary work environment, particularly in a “higher-end” restaurant tends to be cut throat (hence the tired adage “if you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen”). But, i truly cannot wait to leave as a transfer student to a college in southern california where i know i’ll immerse myself in my studies, diverse interests and hobbies, as well as be surrounded by a larger LGBTQ+ community who will see me for simply me <3
submitted by nosnebbb to feminineboys [link] [comments]
In regards to the stares:
My anxieties activate when i feel eyes staring. Sure, it may be optimistic to assume they are in admiration, but years of working on being comfortable in my own body and self-acceptance (with the acknowledgment that not everyone will simply “see” me for me) have left me constantly weary of those who will liberally berate me — publicly and shamelessly.
In regards to being ostracized:
I currently work in the kitchen if a sushi restaurant and, of course, I have made better friendships with the women i work alongside. We are playful, caring, and constantly conversing about our lives. The dynamics between myself and the men, however, are starkly and drastically different. Although I am cordial with most of the men, there are obvious and unspoken walls between myself and them. Particularly because I work in a city that is characteristically conservative. With full transparency, however, several of the men are conversational and we engage in enjoyable small talk.
I was aware that the culinary work environment, particularly in a “higher-end” restaurant tends to be cut throat (hence the tired adage “if you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen”). But, i truly cannot wait to leave as a transfer student to a college in southern california where i know i’ll immerse myself in my studies, diverse interests and hobbies, as well as be surrounded by a larger LGBTQ+ community who will see me for simply me <3
2023.05.28 01:53 gumby9 Where To Find Thai Pad Kra Pao Dish?
Just came back from Thailand and the best food I’ve had there was Pad Kra Pao. Basically spicy basil minced pork with an egg on top. Most Thai places I’ve looked at don’t have it in the menu. Any places you guys recommend?
submitted by gumby9 to AskSF [link] [comments]
2023.05.28 01:11 CatchableElk Why have restaurants all of a sudden started passing card processing fees to patrons?
I was eating at my favorite sushi place in town and noticed on the bottom of the bill a "non cash adjusted price" addition of about 4-5 percent of the total bill. It struck me as a bit odd but didn't think much of it, paid, and left.
That was a month ago and I am noticing it more and more. At local restaurants, coffee shops, bakeries, etc. what irritates me the most is that more often than not there is no advance notice of this fee. They just tack it on assuming you are paying with a card.
Why is this happening now, and will this start to happen with chain locations as well?
submitted by CatchableElk to NoStupidQuestions [link] [comments]
That was a month ago and I am noticing it more and more. At local restaurants, coffee shops, bakeries, etc. what irritates me the most is that more often than not there is no advance notice of this fee. They just tack it on assuming you are paying with a card.
Why is this happening now, and will this start to happen with chain locations as well?
2023.05.28 00:56 CaveLady3000 At sushi spots in my city, the carrot ginger salad dressing is one of my favorite ways to up my veg intake at home. Does a wholesale product exist?
I’m so sorry if it’s not actually authentically Japanese, im in nyc and I’m aware that we just make shit up here. But if anyone knows of a product name I could search for that actually has the same flavor and consistency as what I get from a restaurant, I’d like to order online.
Also, I will note I do make a point to support local businesses when it comes to this, but at this point I just don’t really want to have to order sushi just to get salad dressing for me to use for days and weeks to come. I’ve always had struggles with food and stuff like this has made a big difference, so that’s my priority.
submitted by CaveLady3000 to asianfood [link] [comments]
Also, I will note I do make a point to support local businesses when it comes to this, but at this point I just don’t really want to have to order sushi just to get salad dressing for me to use for days and weeks to come. I’ve always had struggles with food and stuff like this has made a big difference, so that’s my priority.
2023.05.28 00:13 AustralianChrono Chronologica's Drag Race Season 4: Episode 5- Snap That Shot
Arrasando oye papi damelo todo
Jaslene smirks, spinning around as she drops to the floor, making her eyes fixed at the judges as she hits each and every spanish word.
Pues les va de maravilla, la apariencia mas sencilla
Kunthea turns to the side of the stage before dropping in a death drop, flipping their hair around wildly.
Aguacate: “She doesn’t know the WORDS! Perra!”
Pretendamos concentrarnos en lo que haré nuestro cuerpo
Yasmin shakes and shimmies, before she plays with the spikes on her chest as the judges cackle with her campy take on the song.
A Cleopatra no le importa en el amor la entrega
Zazu winks, dancing and giving high energy, as she surprisingly appears to know every beat of the Spanish song.
Arrasando con lo bueno
There’s a split screen as the four girls all dance their ass off, as Chronologica grins, looking at each of them with a smile.
Esta luz que en mi deslumbra
Yasmin hits the ground on her knees, Jaslene lands in a split, Kunthea winks and Zazu twirls as the song ends.
…
…
…
Yasmin Raiz, Shantay you stay.
Yasmin bows.
…
…
Zazu Nova, Shantay you stay.
Omari gasps, as Jaslene looks at Kunthea with shock.
Fiore Stravaganza: “The girls…”
…
…
…
…
…
…
Jaslene Bangus, Shantay you stay.
“Thank you.” Jaslene looks at Kunthea, before hugging her. “I love you, girl.”
Kunthea Angel, you are a beautiful, fierce Queen. But today, I must say sashay… away.
“Fuck yeah.” Kunthea smirks. “Thank you.”
Kunthea hugs Jaslene again, before walking over to Fiore.
“Peace.” Kunthea throws a peace sign.
Kunthea Angel: “I didn’t expect to go so soon. But fuck, you know- shit happens. I fought, and us A.E girls- I know we’re gonna slay.”
Lipstick Message: “A.E girls forever, baby! Good luck, and dominate.”
~
The racers enter the werkroom.
“A.E girls forever, baby.” Jaslene puts her hand on her chest, wiping the mirror.
“What a gag.” Zazu exhales.
“Literally, I am NEVER not cooking before a challenge reveal again.” Yasmin laughs, sitting down.
“..That was an intense time.” Omari purses his lips.
“Intense is an understatement.” Granny laughs.
“You know, the energy was hard- this was challenging.” Zazu puts her heart on her chest. “But I think we need to move forward.”
Aguacate: “I mean, we all KNOW I’ve been fantastic. But whatever, let us move forward, cut the fat a bit.”
“I feel ready for this next challenge already, because it’s an opportunity to prove ourselves.” Haja says. “I’m planning on winning.”
Hideyoshi rolls his eyes.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “I’m PLANNING to win too!”
“I know…” Crayola looks at the others. “Last week was a struggle. But we 10 are here, we are strong, powerful artists- and I am thankful to be working with you all.”
“Working together is great, but I’d love a challenge solo, truly.” Fiore puts her hand around Jaslene. “Love you girl, but a moment for me to focus on myself would be nice.”
“Agreed.” Omari adds.
“Let’s sit in this moment, and celebrate.” Granny takes a half drunk glass. “To whatever comes next!”
The other races begrudgingly cheer.
Haja Hubiani: “I know last week I did good, but I didn’t do GREAT. We’re all here to prove ourselves, but some are showcasing more then others. That has to change.”
“Two wins, my gosh…” Granny smiles at Omari.
Haja Hubiani: “I’m here to prove to the world my style of drag- planned, efficient, high drag… and those who exist? They’ll be damned. Just wait and see…”
Hideyoshi cackles with Aguacate.
Haja Hubiani: “I am here to win.”
~
The Next Day, Yasmin starts handing out plates.
“Hold on, take a plate.” Yasmin smiles.
Yasmin Raiz: “Last time I didn’t cook, I was in the bottom. Oh, no. We’re NEEEEVER taking another chance again!”
“What’s on today’s menu?” Omari raises an eyebrow.
“Veggie Sushi!” Yasmin winks. “With Jasmine Rice.”
“It’s you!” Granny chuckles.
“It is.” Yasmin laughs.
“...Wait, what?” Zazu asks, confused.
“...Jasmine Rice, my name?” Yasmin looks at Zazu.
Zazu gasps.
“Oh, I didn’t realise that either.” Crayola chuckles.
“Neither did I…” Jaslene puts her hand up.
“Same.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Yasmin cackles.
You’ve got drag mail!
Granny drops the bowl of rice.
“DARLING, NOW YOU ARE IN DANGER!” Yasmin yells.
Granny chuckles.
Detox. Relax. It’s time. Home time!
“Home time?” Haja raises an eyebrow.
It’s Drag Time!
Hello, racers.
It’s time to pack up. These last few weeks have been intense. We’re going to separate, detox, rest and relax before you all interact again.
Everyone laughs, whilst looking confused.
For this week’s maxi challenge, I am SHIPPING you back on a two-way ticket home- and here again. You’re going home to present yourselves in the form of a photoshoot, baby!
Jaslene Bangus: “I’ve always been a supermodel. And now, you give me a shoot?” Jaslene smirks. “Slay.”
I want to see your home country, and YOUR DRAG BRAND best represented in the form of a shoot. You have… 30 minutes on the bus to start preparing for the journey home. Good luck… and don’t FUCK IT UP!
Everyone frantically starts running, as Hideyoshi sits.
…It’s go time, Hideyoshi.
“I’m… not planning.” Hideyoshi looks at Chronologica. “I have my idea already.”
Chronologica raises an eyebrow.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “It’s done me well this time. I know it will again.”
Good luck…
Chronologica looks at Hideyoshi, as he slinks into his seat.
~
The racers sit around their bus, looking at each other as they start talking, some planning, some chatting.
“Okay, okay…” Aguacate grins. “My drags. What are we doing? Where are we all going?!”
“I’ve already picked up the phone and made some calls.” Jaslene smirks. “Me and my sisters, powerful trans women in my favourite club in Manila, Stargirl.” Jaslene nods. “I am here to showcase women- power, beautiful and the girls I love.”
Aguacate: “Have other girls steal your focus?!” Aguacate laughs.
“I feel the same.” Granny nods. “I’m going to be taking photos with my kids.” Granny smiles.
Aguacate: “This isn’t your drag brand, my dear.”
“Oh, that’s fun…” Aguacate purses her lips. “How does it mean your drag?”
“For me, it’s about representing me. My family- that is a part, and that, in that… I see the drag.” Granny grins.
Aguacate: “Bad choice, mami…” Aguacate laughs. “Granny, you in DAAAAANGER…” Aguacate looks into the camera. “She may be doing good well, but she’s still a baby Queen, my viewer.”
“I am also doing this.” Crayola adds. “My classroom is my safe haven. I’m going to be reflecting that, in my local classroom.”
Aguacate: “Oh darling, boring!”
“I’m from Venice.” Fiore smiles. “To me, being on a gondola- high drag, couture, Italian theatre… that is me.”
Aguacate: “How original, being beautiful on the river of a- Oh wait, I kinda like that idea.”
“I am a little scared, myself.” Yasmin says. “I’m going to step before the Parliament building in drag.”
“...Drag is illegal, isn’t it?” Crayola looks at Yasmin with concern.
“It is. But it’s meaningful.” Yasmin nods.
Yasmin Raiz: “I want to show me. I am a comedian, but I believe too- my drag is revolutionary.”
Aguacate: “Imagine a prison disqualification?” Aguacate giggles.
“Nature is core to me.” Omari looks around. “I believe myself to be a King of Africa. A Chieftain, and I’m going to go to the Maasai Mara National Reserve. Open space, a natural landscape, Giraffes, Elephants, Lions… and me, the King of the Jungle.”
Aguacate: “He may get attacked. Imagine a MAWED disqualification!” Aguacate laughs. “I’m on fire, like…”
“Khwera Salt Mine.” Haja raises her notepad.
Haja Hubiani: “This is a challenge to showcase my styling skills. I’ve looked at the concept, I’ve looked at the idea… This is MY moment.” Haja clutches her chest.
Aguacate: “I don’t know where that is.”
“McQueen is core to my brand, and I have also planned!” Zazu raises her notepad as Aguacate eyes her. “The McQueen storefront in South Africa.”
“Oooh…” Aguacate purses her lips.
Aguacate: “Girl.” Aguacate giggles.
“And Hideyoshi?” Aguacate raises an eyebrow.
“Not sure yet.” Hideyoshi laughs. “Probably on a traditional stage. That’s where I shine.”
“I’m not going to speak…” Haja whispers under her breath.
“Well, I’M going to Teotihuacán to show my ancient heritage, baby!” Aguacate yells.
“Well…” Granny looks at everyone. “Good luck, all…”
“And don’t fuck it up.” Haja winks.
~
In Mexico…
Aguacate stands before Teotihuacán, dressed as a sun god.
“Today, I am here, representing my NATIVE ROOTS.” Aguacate raises her hands. “I am A GOD!”
The ancient landmark is silent as Aguacate’s voice booms.
“This is me. I believe myself to be a legend.” Aguacate leans against the structure. “ASSISTANT? I NEED A STAFF?”
Aguacate walks to her left and picks up the staff.
“Most of the time, my drag is more camp, but today, I will take an opposing approach. Instead, it is MEXICAN. That is core to it, regardless. So, EMBRACE IT!” Aguacate yells.
“Okay, I want to showcase and act as if I am about to sacrifice someone.” Aguacate looks into the camera. “We did human sacrifice, you know.”
~
Crayola Boxx waves. “Hello!”
Crayola adjusts a picture of herself out of drag as she sits on the desk.
“This is my classroom. It’s not a traditional New Zealand Landmark, but I believe it is MY New Zealand Landmark.” Crayola grins.
Crayola spins around, dressed in a multicoloured look with tons of tassels.
“I’ve been teaching for nearly…” Crayola ponders. “10 years?”
Crayola gulps, before smiling.
“I am old.” Crayola chuckles. “But it is my creative hub. There’s two kinds of Crayola- me in drag, and me out of it.”
Crayola looks into the camera. “Now you get to see both.”
~
Fiore flicks back her hair.
“Hello, darlings.” Fiore smiles. “Welcome to Venice.”
The camera zooms out, booming as Fiore rides a gondola in the middle of the canal based city.
Fiore adjusts her long couture gown that nearly covers the entire boat.
“Whilst I am no longer the girl I once was- living here, my heart began here.” Fiore closes her eyes. “This wet city holds secrets.”
The gondola continues to flow through the small canals.
“Living here, you get used to your sea legs.” Fiore smirks. “I know how to stand on a boat, even in a couture gown in heels.”
The gondola rider gasps as he nearly hits another gondola, and Fiore holds a tight grip on it.
“See?” Fiore smirks.
~
“My grandchildren!” Granny waves.
The kids behind Granny look confused.
“Está tudo bem, crianças! Este é o show da vovó!” Granny yells.
The kids look at Granny with confusion, before hugging her.
“They haven’t seen me in drag before.” Granny says, with a smile.
Suddenly, one of the children start to cry.
“Martin, my dear Martin..” Granny picks them up.
The child continues to cry.
“Well, I think we need to get started.” Granny shrugs. “It’s authentic!”
Granny winks into the camera.
~
Haja waves in a booming undercover mine.
“Welcome to PAKISTAN!” Haja yells.
Haja holds onto a pickaxe and smiles, wearing a multi-layered look with a grin.
“I love to have my drag be beautiful, stylish. I also think at times it can be rough.”
Haja shrugs.
“What can I say, I love to shine.”
Haja touches a crystalline body of water.
“In my heart, I am a diamond under pressure. This is a historic monument… and I am the jewel.” Haja grins.
Haja holds up a crystal gem.
“For me, you will see me shine. This is the only option.” Haja grins.
~
“GIRLS!” Jaslene waves into the camera, as three other women wave.
“Hi.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene adjusts her tight little black dress.
“I have been through many things. I’ve made myself, this body, this skill from the ground up, baby.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene’s sisters hold onto her with a smile.
“These girls are the same. I may be the star… for now.” Jaslene smirks. “But we are the Philippines. We are proud, we are gorgeous, and we stand before you in this stage, one of my favourite venues in the world…”
Jaslene exhales.
“And I have never felt more ready to snap that shot.” Jaslene smirks.
“Take the camera out!”
~
“Welcome to the birth of civilization.” Omari smiles, breathing in the air.
A gust of wind is heard, and Omari looks into the camera.
“It’s a stampede.” Omari looks shocked, before he smirks. “Let’s run. I want pictures in action.”
Omari starts running, as the camera gets shaky.
“I BELIEVE I LIVE IN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL LAND IN THE WORLD!”
An elephant rushes past Omari.
“FOR ME, THE NATURAL ELEMENTS, THE WAY OF LIFE, THE-” Omari chuckles as he runs, the sound of hooves building and building.
“THE ANIMALS!” Omari yells. “AND I KNOW THIS. I THINK OF MYSELF AS THE KING OF SAVANNAH.”
A giraffe runs past and knocks over the camera causing it to break. Omari picks it up dramatically.
“And a survivor. No matter what.” Omari stops, eying the other animals now gone.
“For me, this is a challenge to showcase the Chief. I feel riveted. Here to win. And I hope you enjoy my world.” Omari smirks.
~
Hideyoshi laughs.
“I’m on stage!” Hideyoshi grins, looking into the camera.
“This is a local Kabuki theatre.” Hideyoshi nods. “I feel as if…” Hideyoshi stops himself.
Hideyoshi looks up, looks down… and grins.
“YES!” Hideyoshi nods. “Follow me.”
Hideyoshi walks through the theatre.
“So many doors.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Hideyoshi enters the a backstage portion of the theatre.
“Let’s do it here.” Hideyoshi nods. “WAIT!”
Hideyoshi grabs a mask and grins.
“For me, my drag, my joy is fun. And my brain doesn’t work like everyone else, I know. That’s what I THINK is my superpower.” Hideyoshi grins. “Let’s snap.”
Hideyoshi stops as the camera takes a photo at a flawed angle.
“WAIT, I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!”
~
Yasmin looks slightly nervous before the camera, before nodding.
“This is hypealicious… this is exciting…” Yasmin stands before parliament house, late, late at night.
Yasmin looks around.
“The city is still lit.” Yasmin nods. “It is… beautiful.”
Yasmin exhales.
“I live here proudly. But, the laws, the existence I have is not the same as many. I struggle, living in a society where I can’t be me.”
Yasmin sighs.
“But the reality is, this is my home.” Yasmin looks proudly. “And I believe it will be important to showcase myself.”
Yasmin sits before the steps.
“I want to show anyone who lives here, in this country- we exist, we are proud, and we do the best damn drag in the world!” Yasmin throws her hands in the air.
“Let’s do it.”
~
Zazu looks excitedly.
“AHH!” Zazu cheers.
Zazu stands in front of a ‘McQueen’ store.
“I have a story.” Zazu laughs.
Zazu giggles.
“I watched the movie CARS, and I was a huge fan. Lightning McQueen was a favourite of mine.”
Zazu winks, wearing a real couture McQueen outfit.
“I loved fashion, and McQueen was one of my faves. And I saw the movie and like, LOVED IT.”
Zazu nods.
“So, I obviously thought Lightning McQueen and Alexander McQueen were related. They aren't. SHOCKING, right?” Zazu gasps.
“In my fantasy they are one in the same!” Zazu laughs. “I love being a bit silly. I love fashion. You get a bit of both.”
Zazu giggles. “Okay, let’s do it!”
~
Each of the racers look at the camera as a producer yells.
“You’re going back onto a plane, straight onto the runway for the challenge.”
“OH MY GASPGOSHITICOUS?!” Yasmin yells.
“Bring it.” Omari smirks.
“Oooh…” Haja grins.
“THIS IS SO FUN!” Zazu laughs.
“I’m old.” Granny chuckles. “Can’t we go a little slower?!”
“Fun.” Hideyoshi smiles.
“This was supposed to be a break.” Crayola laughs.
“Fierce.” Fiore chuckles.
“I love you, girls.” Jaslene blows a kiss.
Aguacate cheers. “LET US DO IT!”
~
Stats
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submitted by AustralianChrono to ChronologicasDragRace [link] [comments]
Jaslene smirks, spinning around as she drops to the floor, making her eyes fixed at the judges as she hits each and every spanish word.
Pues les va de maravilla, la apariencia mas sencilla
Kunthea turns to the side of the stage before dropping in a death drop, flipping their hair around wildly.
Aguacate: “She doesn’t know the WORDS! Perra!”
Pretendamos concentrarnos en lo que haré nuestro cuerpo
Yasmin shakes and shimmies, before she plays with the spikes on her chest as the judges cackle with her campy take on the song.
A Cleopatra no le importa en el amor la entrega
Zazu winks, dancing and giving high energy, as she surprisingly appears to know every beat of the Spanish song.
Arrasando con lo bueno
There’s a split screen as the four girls all dance their ass off, as Chronologica grins, looking at each of them with a smile.
Esta luz que en mi deslumbra
Yasmin hits the ground on her knees, Jaslene lands in a split, Kunthea winks and Zazu twirls as the song ends.
…
…
…
Yasmin Raiz, Shantay you stay.
Yasmin bows.
…
…
Zazu Nova, Shantay you stay.
Omari gasps, as Jaslene looks at Kunthea with shock.
Fiore Stravaganza: “The girls…”
…
…
…
…
…
…
Jaslene Bangus, Shantay you stay.
“Thank you.” Jaslene looks at Kunthea, before hugging her. “I love you, girl.”
Kunthea Angel, you are a beautiful, fierce Queen. But today, I must say sashay… away.
“Fuck yeah.” Kunthea smirks. “Thank you.”
Kunthea hugs Jaslene again, before walking over to Fiore.
“Peace.” Kunthea throws a peace sign.
Kunthea Angel: “I didn’t expect to go so soon. But fuck, you know- shit happens. I fought, and us A.E girls- I know we’re gonna slay.”
Lipstick Message: “A.E girls forever, baby! Good luck, and dominate.”
~
The racers enter the werkroom.
“A.E girls forever, baby.” Jaslene puts her hand on her chest, wiping the mirror.
“What a gag.” Zazu exhales.
“Literally, I am NEVER not cooking before a challenge reveal again.” Yasmin laughs, sitting down.
“..That was an intense time.” Omari purses his lips.
“Intense is an understatement.” Granny laughs.
“You know, the energy was hard- this was challenging.” Zazu puts her heart on her chest. “But I think we need to move forward.”
Aguacate: “I mean, we all KNOW I’ve been fantastic. But whatever, let us move forward, cut the fat a bit.”
“I feel ready for this next challenge already, because it’s an opportunity to prove ourselves.” Haja says. “I’m planning on winning.”
Hideyoshi rolls his eyes.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “I’m PLANNING to win too!”
“I know…” Crayola looks at the others. “Last week was a struggle. But we 10 are here, we are strong, powerful artists- and I am thankful to be working with you all.”
“Working together is great, but I’d love a challenge solo, truly.” Fiore puts her hand around Jaslene. “Love you girl, but a moment for me to focus on myself would be nice.”
“Agreed.” Omari adds.
“Let’s sit in this moment, and celebrate.” Granny takes a half drunk glass. “To whatever comes next!”
The other races begrudgingly cheer.
Haja Hubiani: “I know last week I did good, but I didn’t do GREAT. We’re all here to prove ourselves, but some are showcasing more then others. That has to change.”
“Two wins, my gosh…” Granny smiles at Omari.
Haja Hubiani: “I’m here to prove to the world my style of drag- planned, efficient, high drag… and those who exist? They’ll be damned. Just wait and see…”
Hideyoshi cackles with Aguacate.
Haja Hubiani: “I am here to win.”
~
The Next Day, Yasmin starts handing out plates.
“Hold on, take a plate.” Yasmin smiles.
Yasmin Raiz: “Last time I didn’t cook, I was in the bottom. Oh, no. We’re NEEEEVER taking another chance again!”
“What’s on today’s menu?” Omari raises an eyebrow.
“Veggie Sushi!” Yasmin winks. “With Jasmine Rice.”
“It’s you!” Granny chuckles.
“It is.” Yasmin laughs.
“...Wait, what?” Zazu asks, confused.
“...Jasmine Rice, my name?” Yasmin looks at Zazu.
Zazu gasps.
“Oh, I didn’t realise that either.” Crayola chuckles.
“Neither did I…” Jaslene puts her hand up.
“Same.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Yasmin cackles.
You’ve got drag mail!
Granny drops the bowl of rice.
“DARLING, NOW YOU ARE IN DANGER!” Yasmin yells.
Granny chuckles.
Detox. Relax. It’s time. Home time!
“Home time?” Haja raises an eyebrow.
It’s Drag Time!
Hello, racers.
It’s time to pack up. These last few weeks have been intense. We’re going to separate, detox, rest and relax before you all interact again.
Everyone laughs, whilst looking confused.
For this week’s maxi challenge, I am SHIPPING you back on a two-way ticket home- and here again. You’re going home to present yourselves in the form of a photoshoot, baby!
Jaslene Bangus: “I’ve always been a supermodel. And now, you give me a shoot?” Jaslene smirks. “Slay.”
I want to see your home country, and YOUR DRAG BRAND best represented in the form of a shoot. You have… 30 minutes on the bus to start preparing for the journey home. Good luck… and don’t FUCK IT UP!
Everyone frantically starts running, as Hideyoshi sits.
…It’s go time, Hideyoshi.
“I’m… not planning.” Hideyoshi looks at Chronologica. “I have my idea already.”
Chronologica raises an eyebrow.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “It’s done me well this time. I know it will again.”
Good luck…
Chronologica looks at Hideyoshi, as he slinks into his seat.
~
The racers sit around their bus, looking at each other as they start talking, some planning, some chatting.
“Okay, okay…” Aguacate grins. “My drags. What are we doing? Where are we all going?!”
“I’ve already picked up the phone and made some calls.” Jaslene smirks. “Me and my sisters, powerful trans women in my favourite club in Manila, Stargirl.” Jaslene nods. “I am here to showcase women- power, beautiful and the girls I love.”
Aguacate: “Have other girls steal your focus?!” Aguacate laughs.
“I feel the same.” Granny nods. “I’m going to be taking photos with my kids.” Granny smiles.
Aguacate: “This isn’t your drag brand, my dear.”
“Oh, that’s fun…” Aguacate purses her lips. “How does it mean your drag?”
“For me, it’s about representing me. My family- that is a part, and that, in that… I see the drag.” Granny grins.
Aguacate: “Bad choice, mami…” Aguacate laughs. “Granny, you in DAAAAANGER…” Aguacate looks into the camera. “She may be doing good well, but she’s still a baby Queen, my viewer.”
“I am also doing this.” Crayola adds. “My classroom is my safe haven. I’m going to be reflecting that, in my local classroom.”
Aguacate: “Oh darling, boring!”
“I’m from Venice.” Fiore smiles. “To me, being on a gondola- high drag, couture, Italian theatre… that is me.”
Aguacate: “How original, being beautiful on the river of a- Oh wait, I kinda like that idea.”
“I am a little scared, myself.” Yasmin says. “I’m going to step before the Parliament building in drag.”
“...Drag is illegal, isn’t it?” Crayola looks at Yasmin with concern.
“It is. But it’s meaningful.” Yasmin nods.
Yasmin Raiz: “I want to show me. I am a comedian, but I believe too- my drag is revolutionary.”
Aguacate: “Imagine a prison disqualification?” Aguacate giggles.
“Nature is core to me.” Omari looks around. “I believe myself to be a King of Africa. A Chieftain, and I’m going to go to the Maasai Mara National Reserve. Open space, a natural landscape, Giraffes, Elephants, Lions… and me, the King of the Jungle.”
Aguacate: “He may get attacked. Imagine a MAWED disqualification!” Aguacate laughs. “I’m on fire, like…”
“Khwera Salt Mine.” Haja raises her notepad.
Haja Hubiani: “This is a challenge to showcase my styling skills. I’ve looked at the concept, I’ve looked at the idea… This is MY moment.” Haja clutches her chest.
Aguacate: “I don’t know where that is.”
“McQueen is core to my brand, and I have also planned!” Zazu raises her notepad as Aguacate eyes her. “The McQueen storefront in South Africa.”
“Oooh…” Aguacate purses her lips.
Aguacate: “Girl.” Aguacate giggles.
“And Hideyoshi?” Aguacate raises an eyebrow.
“Not sure yet.” Hideyoshi laughs. “Probably on a traditional stage. That’s where I shine.”
“I’m not going to speak…” Haja whispers under her breath.
“Well, I’M going to Teotihuacán to show my ancient heritage, baby!” Aguacate yells.
“Well…” Granny looks at everyone. “Good luck, all…”
“And don’t fuck it up.” Haja winks.
~
In Mexico…
Aguacate stands before Teotihuacán, dressed as a sun god.
“Today, I am here, representing my NATIVE ROOTS.” Aguacate raises her hands. “I am A GOD!”
The ancient landmark is silent as Aguacate’s voice booms.
“This is me. I believe myself to be a legend.” Aguacate leans against the structure. “ASSISTANT? I NEED A STAFF?”
Aguacate walks to her left and picks up the staff.
“Most of the time, my drag is more camp, but today, I will take an opposing approach. Instead, it is MEXICAN. That is core to it, regardless. So, EMBRACE IT!” Aguacate yells.
“Okay, I want to showcase and act as if I am about to sacrifice someone.” Aguacate looks into the camera. “We did human sacrifice, you know.”
~
Crayola Boxx waves. “Hello!”
Crayola adjusts a picture of herself out of drag as she sits on the desk.
“This is my classroom. It’s not a traditional New Zealand Landmark, but I believe it is MY New Zealand Landmark.” Crayola grins.
Crayola spins around, dressed in a multicoloured look with tons of tassels.
“I’ve been teaching for nearly…” Crayola ponders. “10 years?”
Crayola gulps, before smiling.
“I am old.” Crayola chuckles. “But it is my creative hub. There’s two kinds of Crayola- me in drag, and me out of it.”
Crayola looks into the camera. “Now you get to see both.”
~
Fiore flicks back her hair.
“Hello, darlings.” Fiore smiles. “Welcome to Venice.”
The camera zooms out, booming as Fiore rides a gondola in the middle of the canal based city.
Fiore adjusts her long couture gown that nearly covers the entire boat.
“Whilst I am no longer the girl I once was- living here, my heart began here.” Fiore closes her eyes. “This wet city holds secrets.”
The gondola continues to flow through the small canals.
“Living here, you get used to your sea legs.” Fiore smirks. “I know how to stand on a boat, even in a couture gown in heels.”
The gondola rider gasps as he nearly hits another gondola, and Fiore holds a tight grip on it.
“See?” Fiore smirks.
~
“My grandchildren!” Granny waves.
The kids behind Granny look confused.
“Está tudo bem, crianças! Este é o show da vovó!” Granny yells.
The kids look at Granny with confusion, before hugging her.
“They haven’t seen me in drag before.” Granny says, with a smile.
Suddenly, one of the children start to cry.
“Martin, my dear Martin..” Granny picks them up.
The child continues to cry.
“Well, I think we need to get started.” Granny shrugs. “It’s authentic!”
Granny winks into the camera.
~
Haja waves in a booming undercover mine.
“Welcome to PAKISTAN!” Haja yells.
Haja holds onto a pickaxe and smiles, wearing a multi-layered look with a grin.
“I love to have my drag be beautiful, stylish. I also think at times it can be rough.”
Haja shrugs.
“What can I say, I love to shine.”
Haja touches a crystalline body of water.
“In my heart, I am a diamond under pressure. This is a historic monument… and I am the jewel.” Haja grins.
Haja holds up a crystal gem.
“For me, you will see me shine. This is the only option.” Haja grins.
~
“GIRLS!” Jaslene waves into the camera, as three other women wave.
“Hi.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene adjusts her tight little black dress.
“I have been through many things. I’ve made myself, this body, this skill from the ground up, baby.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene’s sisters hold onto her with a smile.
“These girls are the same. I may be the star… for now.” Jaslene smirks. “But we are the Philippines. We are proud, we are gorgeous, and we stand before you in this stage, one of my favourite venues in the world…”
Jaslene exhales.
“And I have never felt more ready to snap that shot.” Jaslene smirks.
“Take the camera out!”
~
“Welcome to the birth of civilization.” Omari smiles, breathing in the air.
A gust of wind is heard, and Omari looks into the camera.
“It’s a stampede.” Omari looks shocked, before he smirks. “Let’s run. I want pictures in action.”
Omari starts running, as the camera gets shaky.
“I BELIEVE I LIVE IN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL LAND IN THE WORLD!”
An elephant rushes past Omari.
“FOR ME, THE NATURAL ELEMENTS, THE WAY OF LIFE, THE-” Omari chuckles as he runs, the sound of hooves building and building.
“THE ANIMALS!” Omari yells. “AND I KNOW THIS. I THINK OF MYSELF AS THE KING OF SAVANNAH.”
A giraffe runs past and knocks over the camera causing it to break. Omari picks it up dramatically.
“And a survivor. No matter what.” Omari stops, eying the other animals now gone.
“For me, this is a challenge to showcase the Chief. I feel riveted. Here to win. And I hope you enjoy my world.” Omari smirks.
~
Hideyoshi laughs.
“I’m on stage!” Hideyoshi grins, looking into the camera.
“This is a local Kabuki theatre.” Hideyoshi nods. “I feel as if…” Hideyoshi stops himself.
Hideyoshi looks up, looks down… and grins.
“YES!” Hideyoshi nods. “Follow me.”
Hideyoshi walks through the theatre.
“So many doors.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Hideyoshi enters the a backstage portion of the theatre.
“Let’s do it here.” Hideyoshi nods. “WAIT!”
Hideyoshi grabs a mask and grins.
“For me, my drag, my joy is fun. And my brain doesn’t work like everyone else, I know. That’s what I THINK is my superpower.” Hideyoshi grins. “Let’s snap.”
Hideyoshi stops as the camera takes a photo at a flawed angle.
“WAIT, I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!”
~
Yasmin looks slightly nervous before the camera, before nodding.
“This is hypealicious… this is exciting…” Yasmin stands before parliament house, late, late at night.
Yasmin looks around.
“The city is still lit.” Yasmin nods. “It is… beautiful.”
Yasmin exhales.
“I live here proudly. But, the laws, the existence I have is not the same as many. I struggle, living in a society where I can’t be me.”
Yasmin sighs.
“But the reality is, this is my home.” Yasmin looks proudly. “And I believe it will be important to showcase myself.”
Yasmin sits before the steps.
“I want to show anyone who lives here, in this country- we exist, we are proud, and we do the best damn drag in the world!” Yasmin throws her hands in the air.
“Let’s do it.”
~
Zazu looks excitedly.
“AHH!” Zazu cheers.
Zazu stands in front of a ‘McQueen’ store.
“I have a story.” Zazu laughs.
Zazu giggles.
“I watched the movie CARS, and I was a huge fan. Lightning McQueen was a favourite of mine.”
Zazu winks, wearing a real couture McQueen outfit.
“I loved fashion, and McQueen was one of my faves. And I saw the movie and like, LOVED IT.”
Zazu nods.
“So, I obviously thought Lightning McQueen and Alexander McQueen were related. They aren't. SHOCKING, right?” Zazu gasps.
“In my fantasy they are one in the same!” Zazu laughs. “I love being a bit silly. I love fashion. You get a bit of both.”
Zazu giggles. “Okay, let’s do it!”
~
Each of the racers look at the camera as a producer yells.
“You’re going back onto a plane, straight onto the runway for the challenge.”
“OH MY GASPGOSHITICOUS?!” Yasmin yells.
“Bring it.” Omari smirks.
“Oooh…” Haja grins.
“THIS IS SO FUN!” Zazu laughs.
“I’m old.” Granny chuckles. “Can’t we go a little slower?!”
“Fun.” Hideyoshi smiles.
“This was supposed to be a break.” Crayola laughs.
“Fierce.” Fiore chuckles.
“I love you, girls.” Jaslene blows a kiss.
Aguacate cheers. “LET US DO IT!”
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet
2023.05.28 00:13 AustralianChrono Chronologica's Drag Race Season 4: Episode 5- Snap That Shot
Arrasando oye papi damelo todo
Jaslene smirks, spinning around as she drops to the floor, making her eyes fixed at the judges as she hits each and every spanish word.
Pues les va de maravilla, la apariencia mas sencilla
Kunthea turns to the side of the stage before dropping in a death drop, flipping their hair around wildly.
Aguacate: “She doesn’t know the WORDS! Perra!”
Pretendamos concentrarnos en lo que haré nuestro cuerpo
Yasmin shakes and shimmies, before she plays with the spikes on her chest as the judges cackle with her campy take on the song.
A Cleopatra no le importa en el amor la entrega
Zazu winks, dancing and giving high energy, as she surprisingly appears to know every beat of the Spanish song.
Arrasando con lo bueno
There’s a split screen as the four girls all dance their ass off, as Chronologica grins, looking at each of them with a smile.
Esta luz que en mi deslumbra
Yasmin hits the ground on her knees, Jaslene lands in a split, Kunthea winks and Zazu twirls as the song ends.
…
…
…
Yasmin Raiz, Shantay you stay.
Yasmin bows.
…
…
Zazu Nova, Shantay you stay.
Omari gasps, as Jaslene looks at Kunthea with shock.
Fiore Stravaganza: “The girls…”
…
…
…
…
…
…
Jaslene Bangus, Shantay you stay.
“Thank you.” Jaslene looks at Kunthea, before hugging her. “I love you, girl.”
Kunthea Angel, you are a beautiful, fierce Queen. But today, I must say sashay… away.
“Fuck yeah.” Kunthea smirks. “Thank you.”
Kunthea hugs Jaslene again, before walking over to Fiore.
“Peace.” Kunthea throws a peace sign.
Kunthea Angel: “I didn’t expect to go so soon. But fuck, you know- shit happens. I fought, and us A.E girls- I know we’re gonna slay.”
Lipstick Message: “A.E girls forever, baby! Good luck, and dominate.”
~
The racers enter the werkroom.
“A.E girls forever, baby.” Jaslene puts her hand on her chest, wiping the mirror.
“What a gag.” Zazu exhales.
“Literally, I am NEVER not cooking before a challenge reveal again.” Yasmin laughs, sitting down.
“..That was an intense time.” Omari purses his lips.
“Intense is an understatement.” Granny laughs.
“You know, the energy was hard- this was challenging.” Zazu puts her heart on her chest. “But I think we need to move forward.”
Aguacate: “I mean, we all KNOW I’ve been fantastic. But whatever, let us move forward, cut the fat a bit.”
“I feel ready for this next challenge already, because it’s an opportunity to prove ourselves.” Haja says. “I’m planning on winning.”
Hideyoshi rolls his eyes.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “I’m PLANNING to win too!”
“I know…” Crayola looks at the others. “Last week was a struggle. But we 10 are here, we are strong, powerful artists- and I am thankful to be working with you all.”
“Working together is great, but I’d love a challenge solo, truly.” Fiore puts her hand around Jaslene. “Love you girl, but a moment for me to focus on myself would be nice.”
“Agreed.” Omari adds.
“Let’s sit in this moment, and celebrate.” Granny takes a half drunk glass. “To whatever comes next!”
The other races begrudgingly cheer.
Haja Hubiani: “I know last week I did good, but I didn’t do GREAT. We’re all here to prove ourselves, but some are showcasing more then others. That has to change.”
“Two wins, my gosh…” Granny smiles at Omari.
Haja Hubiani: “I’m here to prove to the world my style of drag- planned, efficient, high drag… and those who exist? They’ll be damned. Just wait and see…”
Hideyoshi cackles with Aguacate.
Haja Hubiani: “I am here to win.”
~
The Next Day, Yasmin starts handing out plates.
“Hold on, take a plate.” Yasmin smiles.
Yasmin Raiz: “Last time I didn’t cook, I was in the bottom. Oh, no. We’re NEEEEVER taking another chance again!”
“What’s on today’s menu?” Omari raises an eyebrow.
“Veggie Sushi!” Yasmin winks. “With Jasmine Rice.”
“It’s you!” Granny chuckles.
“It is.” Yasmin laughs.
“...Wait, what?” Zazu asks, confused.
“...Jasmine Rice, my name?” Yasmin looks at Zazu.
Zazu gasps.
“Oh, I didn’t realise that either.” Crayola chuckles.
“Neither did I…” Jaslene puts her hand up.
“Same.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Yasmin cackles.
You’ve got drag mail!
Granny drops the bowl of rice.
“DARLING, NOW YOU ARE IN DANGER!” Yasmin yells.
Granny chuckles.
Detox. Relax. It’s time. Home time!
“Home time?” Haja raises an eyebrow.
It’s Drag Time!
Hello, racers.
It’s time to pack up. These last few weeks have been intense. We’re going to separate, detox, rest and relax before you all interact again.
Everyone laughs, whilst looking confused.
For this week’s maxi challenge, I am SHIPPING you back on a two-way ticket home- and here again. You’re going home to present yourselves in the form of a photoshoot, baby!
Jaslene Bangus: “I’ve always been a supermodel. And now, you give me a shoot?” Jaslene smirks. “Slay.”
I want to see your home country, and YOUR DRAG BRAND best represented in the form of a shoot. You have… 30 minutes on the bus to start preparing for the journey home. Good luck… and don’t FUCK IT UP!
Everyone frantically starts running, as Hideyoshi sits.
…It’s go time, Hideyoshi.
“I’m… not planning.” Hideyoshi looks at Chronologica. “I have my idea already.”
Chronologica raises an eyebrow.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “It’s done me well this time. I know it will again.”
Good luck…
Chronologica looks at Hideyoshi, as he slinks into his seat.
~
The racers sit around their bus, looking at each other as they start talking, some planning, some chatting.
“Okay, okay…” Aguacate grins. “My drags. What are we doing? Where are we all going?!”
“I’ve already picked up the phone and made some calls.” Jaslene smirks. “Me and my sisters, powerful trans women in my favourite club in Manila, Stargirl.” Jaslene nods. “I am here to showcase women- power, beautiful and the girls I love.”
Aguacate: “Have other girls steal your focus?!” Aguacate laughs.
“I feel the same.” Granny nods. “I’m going to be taking photos with my kids.” Granny smiles.
Aguacate: “This isn’t your drag brand, my dear.”
“Oh, that’s fun…” Aguacate purses her lips. “How does it mean your drag?”
“For me, it’s about representing me. My family- that is a part, and that, in that… I see the drag.” Granny grins.
Aguacate: “Bad choice, mami…” Aguacate laughs. “Granny, you in DAAAAANGER…” Aguacate looks into the camera. “She may be doing good well, but she’s still a baby Queen, my viewer.”
“I am also doing this.” Crayola adds. “My classroom is my safe haven. I’m going to be reflecting that, in my local classroom.”
Aguacate: “Oh darling, boring!”
“I’m from Venice.” Fiore smiles. “To me, being on a gondola- high drag, couture, Italian theatre… that is me.”
Aguacate: “How original, being beautiful on the river of a- Oh wait, I kinda like that idea.”
“I am a little scared, myself.” Yasmin says. “I’m going to step before the Parliament building in drag.”
“...Drag is illegal, isn’t it?” Crayola looks at Yasmin with concern.
“It is. But it’s meaningful.” Yasmin nods.
Yasmin Raiz: “I want to show me. I am a comedian, but I believe too- my drag is revolutionary.”
Aguacate: “Imagine a prison disqualification?” Aguacate giggles.
“Nature is core to me.” Omari looks around. “I believe myself to be a King of Africa. A Chieftain, and I’m going to go to the Maasai Mara National Reserve. Open space, a natural landscape, Giraffes, Elephants, Lions… and me, the King of the Jungle.”
Aguacate: “He may get attacked. Imagine a MAWED disqualification!” Aguacate laughs. “I’m on fire, like…”
“Khwera Salt Mine.” Haja raises her notepad.
Haja Hubiani: “This is a challenge to showcase my styling skills. I’ve looked at the concept, I’ve looked at the idea… This is MY moment.” Haja clutches her chest.
Aguacate: “I don’t know where that is.”
“McQueen is core to my brand, and I have also planned!” Zazu raises her notepad as Aguacate eyes her. “The McQueen storefront in South Africa.”
“Oooh…” Aguacate purses her lips.
Aguacate: “Girl.” Aguacate giggles.
“And Hideyoshi?” Aguacate raises an eyebrow.
“Not sure yet.” Hideyoshi laughs. “Probably on a traditional stage. That’s where I shine.”
“I’m not going to speak…” Haja whispers under her breath.
“Well, I’M going to Teotihuacán to show my ancient heritage, baby!” Aguacate yells.
“Well…” Granny looks at everyone. “Good luck, all…”
“And don’t fuck it up.” Haja winks.
~
In Mexico…
Aguacate stands before Teotihuacán, dressed as a sun god.
“Today, I am here, representing my NATIVE ROOTS.” Aguacate raises her hands. “I am A GOD!”
The ancient landmark is silent as Aguacate’s voice booms.
“This is me. I believe myself to be a legend.” Aguacate leans against the structure. “ASSISTANT? I NEED A STAFF?”
Aguacate walks to her left and picks up the staff.
“Most of the time, my drag is more camp, but today, I will take an opposing approach. Instead, it is MEXICAN. That is core to it, regardless. So, EMBRACE IT!” Aguacate yells.
“Okay, I want to showcase and act as if I am about to sacrifice someone.” Aguacate looks into the camera. “We did human sacrifice, you know.”
~
Crayola Boxx waves. “Hello!”
Crayola adjusts a picture of herself out of drag as she sits on the desk.
“This is my classroom. It’s not a traditional New Zealand Landmark, but I believe it is MY New Zealand Landmark.” Crayola grins.
Crayola spins around, dressed in a multicoloured look with tons of tassels.
“I’ve been teaching for nearly…” Crayola ponders. “10 years?”
Crayola gulps, before smiling.
“I am old.” Crayola chuckles. “But it is my creative hub. There’s two kinds of Crayola- me in drag, and me out of it.”
Crayola looks into the camera. “Now you get to see both.”
~
Fiore flicks back her hair.
“Hello, darlings.” Fiore smiles. “Welcome to Venice.”
The camera zooms out, booming as Fiore rides a gondola in the middle of the canal based city.
Fiore adjusts her long couture gown that nearly covers the entire boat.
“Whilst I am no longer the girl I once was- living here, my heart began here.” Fiore closes her eyes. “This wet city holds secrets.”
The gondola continues to flow through the small canals.
“Living here, you get used to your sea legs.” Fiore smirks. “I know how to stand on a boat, even in a couture gown in heels.”
The gondola rider gasps as he nearly hits another gondola, and Fiore holds a tight grip on it.
“See?” Fiore smirks.
~
“My grandchildren!” Granny waves.
The kids behind Granny look confused.
“Está tudo bem, crianças! Este é o show da vovó!” Granny yells.
The kids look at Granny with confusion, before hugging her.
“They haven’t seen me in drag before.” Granny says, with a smile.
Suddenly, one of the children start to cry.
“Martin, my dear Martin..” Granny picks them up.
The child continues to cry.
“Well, I think we need to get started.” Granny shrugs. “It’s authentic!”
Granny winks into the camera.
~
Haja waves in a booming undercover mine.
“Welcome to PAKISTAN!” Haja yells.
Haja holds onto a pickaxe and smiles, wearing a multi-layered look with a grin.
“I love to have my drag be beautiful, stylish. I also think at times it can be rough.”
Haja shrugs.
“What can I say, I love to shine.”
Haja touches a crystalline body of water.
“In my heart, I am a diamond under pressure. This is a historic monument… and I am the jewel.” Haja grins.
Haja holds up a crystal gem.
“For me, you will see me shine. This is the only option.” Haja grins.
~
“GIRLS!” Jaslene waves into the camera, as three other women wave.
“Hi.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene adjusts her tight little black dress.
“I have been through many things. I’ve made myself, this body, this skill from the ground up, baby.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene’s sisters hold onto her with a smile.
“These girls are the same. I may be the star… for now.” Jaslene smirks. “But we are the Philippines. We are proud, we are gorgeous, and we stand before you in this stage, one of my favourite venues in the world…”
Jaslene exhales.
“And I have never felt more ready to snap that shot.” Jaslene smirks.
“Take the camera out!”
~
“Welcome to the birth of civilization.” Omari smiles, breathing in the air.
A gust of wind is heard, and Omari looks into the camera.
“It’s a stampede.” Omari looks shocked, before he smirks. “Let’s run. I want pictures in action.”
Omari starts running, as the camera gets shaky.
“I BELIEVE I LIVE IN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL LAND IN THE WORLD!”
An elephant rushes past Omari.
“FOR ME, THE NATURAL ELEMENTS, THE WAY OF LIFE, THE-” Omari chuckles as he runs, the sound of hooves building and building.
“THE ANIMALS!” Omari yells. “AND I KNOW THIS. I THINK OF MYSELF AS THE KING OF SAVANNAH.”
A giraffe runs past and knocks over the camera causing it to break. Omari picks it up dramatically.
“And a survivor. No matter what.” Omari stops, eying the other animals now gone.
“For me, this is a challenge to showcase the Chief. I feel riveted. Here to win. And I hope you enjoy my world.” Omari smirks.
~
Hideyoshi laughs.
“I’m on stage!” Hideyoshi grins, looking into the camera.
“This is a local Kabuki theatre.” Hideyoshi nods. “I feel as if…” Hideyoshi stops himself.
Hideyoshi looks up, looks down… and grins.
“YES!” Hideyoshi nods. “Follow me.”
Hideyoshi walks through the theatre.
“So many doors.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Hideyoshi enters the a backstage portion of the theatre.
“Let’s do it here.” Hideyoshi nods. “WAIT!”
Hideyoshi grabs a mask and grins.
“For me, my drag, my joy is fun. And my brain doesn’t work like everyone else, I know. That’s what I THINK is my superpower.” Hideyoshi grins. “Let’s snap.”
Hideyoshi stops as the camera takes a photo at a flawed angle.
“WAIT, I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!”
~
Yasmin looks slightly nervous before the camera, before nodding.
“This is hypealicious… this is exciting…” Yasmin stands before parliament house, late, late at night.
Yasmin looks around.
“The city is still lit.” Yasmin nods. “It is… beautiful.”
Yasmin exhales.
“I live here proudly. But, the laws, the existence I have is not the same as many. I struggle, living in a society where I can’t be me.”
Yasmin sighs.
“But the reality is, this is my home.” Yasmin looks proudly. “And I believe it will be important to showcase myself.”
Yasmin sits before the steps.
“I want to show anyone who lives here, in this country- we exist, we are proud, and we do the best damn drag in the world!” Yasmin throws her hands in the air.
“Let’s do it.”
~
Zazu looks excitedly.
“AHH!” Zazu cheers.
Zazu stands in front of a ‘McQueen’ store.
“I have a story.” Zazu laughs.
Zazu giggles.
“I watched the movie CARS, and I was a huge fan. Lightning McQueen was a favourite of mine.”
Zazu winks, wearing a real couture McQueen outfit.
“I loved fashion, and McQueen was one of my faves. And I saw the movie and like, LOVED IT.”
Zazu nods.
“So, I obviously thought Lightning McQueen and Alexander McQueen were related. They aren't. SHOCKING, right?” Zazu gasps.
“In my fantasy they are one in the same!” Zazu laughs. “I love being a bit silly. I love fashion. You get a bit of both.”
Zazu giggles. “Okay, let’s do it!”
~
Each of the racers look at the camera as a producer yells.
“You’re going back onto a plane, straight onto the runway for the challenge.”
“OH MY GASPGOSHITICOUS?!” Yasmin yells.
“Bring it.” Omari smirks.
“Oooh…” Haja grins.
“THIS IS SO FUN!” Zazu laughs.
“I’m old.” Granny chuckles. “Can’t we go a little slower?!”
“Fun.” Hideyoshi smiles.
“This was supposed to be a break.” Crayola laughs.
“Fierce.” Fiore chuckles.
“I love you, girls.” Jaslene blows a kiss.
Aguacate cheers. “LET US DO IT!”
~
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Jaslene smirks, spinning around as she drops to the floor, making her eyes fixed at the judges as she hits each and every spanish word.
Pues les va de maravilla, la apariencia mas sencilla
Kunthea turns to the side of the stage before dropping in a death drop, flipping their hair around wildly.
Aguacate: “She doesn’t know the WORDS! Perra!”
Pretendamos concentrarnos en lo que haré nuestro cuerpo
Yasmin shakes and shimmies, before she plays with the spikes on her chest as the judges cackle with her campy take on the song.
A Cleopatra no le importa en el amor la entrega
Zazu winks, dancing and giving high energy, as she surprisingly appears to know every beat of the Spanish song.
Arrasando con lo bueno
There’s a split screen as the four girls all dance their ass off, as Chronologica grins, looking at each of them with a smile.
Esta luz que en mi deslumbra
Yasmin hits the ground on her knees, Jaslene lands in a split, Kunthea winks and Zazu twirls as the song ends.
…
…
…
Yasmin Raiz, Shantay you stay.
Yasmin bows.
…
…
Zazu Nova, Shantay you stay.
Omari gasps, as Jaslene looks at Kunthea with shock.
Fiore Stravaganza: “The girls…”
…
…
…
…
…
…
Jaslene Bangus, Shantay you stay.
“Thank you.” Jaslene looks at Kunthea, before hugging her. “I love you, girl.”
Kunthea Angel, you are a beautiful, fierce Queen. But today, I must say sashay… away.
“Fuck yeah.” Kunthea smirks. “Thank you.”
Kunthea hugs Jaslene again, before walking over to Fiore.
“Peace.” Kunthea throws a peace sign.
Kunthea Angel: “I didn’t expect to go so soon. But fuck, you know- shit happens. I fought, and us A.E girls- I know we’re gonna slay.”
Lipstick Message: “A.E girls forever, baby! Good luck, and dominate.”
~
The racers enter the werkroom.
“A.E girls forever, baby.” Jaslene puts her hand on her chest, wiping the mirror.
“What a gag.” Zazu exhales.
“Literally, I am NEVER not cooking before a challenge reveal again.” Yasmin laughs, sitting down.
“..That was an intense time.” Omari purses his lips.
“Intense is an understatement.” Granny laughs.
“You know, the energy was hard- this was challenging.” Zazu puts her heart on her chest. “But I think we need to move forward.”
Aguacate: “I mean, we all KNOW I’ve been fantastic. But whatever, let us move forward, cut the fat a bit.”
“I feel ready for this next challenge already, because it’s an opportunity to prove ourselves.” Haja says. “I’m planning on winning.”
Hideyoshi rolls his eyes.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “I’m PLANNING to win too!”
“I know…” Crayola looks at the others. “Last week was a struggle. But we 10 are here, we are strong, powerful artists- and I am thankful to be working with you all.”
“Working together is great, but I’d love a challenge solo, truly.” Fiore puts her hand around Jaslene. “Love you girl, but a moment for me to focus on myself would be nice.”
“Agreed.” Omari adds.
“Let’s sit in this moment, and celebrate.” Granny takes a half drunk glass. “To whatever comes next!”
The other races begrudgingly cheer.
Haja Hubiani: “I know last week I did good, but I didn’t do GREAT. We’re all here to prove ourselves, but some are showcasing more then others. That has to change.”
“Two wins, my gosh…” Granny smiles at Omari.
Haja Hubiani: “I’m here to prove to the world my style of drag- planned, efficient, high drag… and those who exist? They’ll be damned. Just wait and see…”
Hideyoshi cackles with Aguacate.
Haja Hubiani: “I am here to win.”
~
The Next Day, Yasmin starts handing out plates.
“Hold on, take a plate.” Yasmin smiles.
Yasmin Raiz: “Last time I didn’t cook, I was in the bottom. Oh, no. We’re NEEEEVER taking another chance again!”
“What’s on today’s menu?” Omari raises an eyebrow.
“Veggie Sushi!” Yasmin winks. “With Jasmine Rice.”
“It’s you!” Granny chuckles.
“It is.” Yasmin laughs.
“...Wait, what?” Zazu asks, confused.
“...Jasmine Rice, my name?” Yasmin looks at Zazu.
Zazu gasps.
“Oh, I didn’t realise that either.” Crayola chuckles.
“Neither did I…” Jaslene puts her hand up.
“Same.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Yasmin cackles.
You’ve got drag mail!
Granny drops the bowl of rice.
“DARLING, NOW YOU ARE IN DANGER!” Yasmin yells.
Granny chuckles.
Detox. Relax. It’s time. Home time!
“Home time?” Haja raises an eyebrow.
It’s Drag Time!
Hello, racers.
It’s time to pack up. These last few weeks have been intense. We’re going to separate, detox, rest and relax before you all interact again.
Everyone laughs, whilst looking confused.
For this week’s maxi challenge, I am SHIPPING you back on a two-way ticket home- and here again. You’re going home to present yourselves in the form of a photoshoot, baby!
Jaslene Bangus: “I’ve always been a supermodel. And now, you give me a shoot?” Jaslene smirks. “Slay.”
I want to see your home country, and YOUR DRAG BRAND best represented in the form of a shoot. You have… 30 minutes on the bus to start preparing for the journey home. Good luck… and don’t FUCK IT UP!
Everyone frantically starts running, as Hideyoshi sits.
…It’s go time, Hideyoshi.
“I’m… not planning.” Hideyoshi looks at Chronologica. “I have my idea already.”
Chronologica raises an eyebrow.
Toyotomi Hideyoshi: “It’s done me well this time. I know it will again.”
Good luck…
Chronologica looks at Hideyoshi, as he slinks into his seat.
~
The racers sit around their bus, looking at each other as they start talking, some planning, some chatting.
“Okay, okay…” Aguacate grins. “My drags. What are we doing? Where are we all going?!”
“I’ve already picked up the phone and made some calls.” Jaslene smirks. “Me and my sisters, powerful trans women in my favourite club in Manila, Stargirl.” Jaslene nods. “I am here to showcase women- power, beautiful and the girls I love.”
Aguacate: “Have other girls steal your focus?!” Aguacate laughs.
“I feel the same.” Granny nods. “I’m going to be taking photos with my kids.” Granny smiles.
Aguacate: “This isn’t your drag brand, my dear.”
“Oh, that’s fun…” Aguacate purses her lips. “How does it mean your drag?”
“For me, it’s about representing me. My family- that is a part, and that, in that… I see the drag.” Granny grins.
Aguacate: “Bad choice, mami…” Aguacate laughs. “Granny, you in DAAAAANGER…” Aguacate looks into the camera. “She may be doing good well, but she’s still a baby Queen, my viewer.”
“I am also doing this.” Crayola adds. “My classroom is my safe haven. I’m going to be reflecting that, in my local classroom.”
Aguacate: “Oh darling, boring!”
“I’m from Venice.” Fiore smiles. “To me, being on a gondola- high drag, couture, Italian theatre… that is me.”
Aguacate: “How original, being beautiful on the river of a- Oh wait, I kinda like that idea.”
“I am a little scared, myself.” Yasmin says. “I’m going to step before the Parliament building in drag.”
“...Drag is illegal, isn’t it?” Crayola looks at Yasmin with concern.
“It is. But it’s meaningful.” Yasmin nods.
Yasmin Raiz: “I want to show me. I am a comedian, but I believe too- my drag is revolutionary.”
Aguacate: “Imagine a prison disqualification?” Aguacate giggles.
“Nature is core to me.” Omari looks around. “I believe myself to be a King of Africa. A Chieftain, and I’m going to go to the Maasai Mara National Reserve. Open space, a natural landscape, Giraffes, Elephants, Lions… and me, the King of the Jungle.”
Aguacate: “He may get attacked. Imagine a MAWED disqualification!” Aguacate laughs. “I’m on fire, like…”
“Khwera Salt Mine.” Haja raises her notepad.
Haja Hubiani: “This is a challenge to showcase my styling skills. I’ve looked at the concept, I’ve looked at the idea… This is MY moment.” Haja clutches her chest.
Aguacate: “I don’t know where that is.”
“McQueen is core to my brand, and I have also planned!” Zazu raises her notepad as Aguacate eyes her. “The McQueen storefront in South Africa.”
“Oooh…” Aguacate purses her lips.
Aguacate: “Girl.” Aguacate giggles.
“And Hideyoshi?” Aguacate raises an eyebrow.
“Not sure yet.” Hideyoshi laughs. “Probably on a traditional stage. That’s where I shine.”
“I’m not going to speak…” Haja whispers under her breath.
“Well, I’M going to Teotihuacán to show my ancient heritage, baby!” Aguacate yells.
“Well…” Granny looks at everyone. “Good luck, all…”
“And don’t fuck it up.” Haja winks.
~
In Mexico…
Aguacate stands before Teotihuacán, dressed as a sun god.
“Today, I am here, representing my NATIVE ROOTS.” Aguacate raises her hands. “I am A GOD!”
The ancient landmark is silent as Aguacate’s voice booms.
“This is me. I believe myself to be a legend.” Aguacate leans against the structure. “ASSISTANT? I NEED A STAFF?”
Aguacate walks to her left and picks up the staff.
“Most of the time, my drag is more camp, but today, I will take an opposing approach. Instead, it is MEXICAN. That is core to it, regardless. So, EMBRACE IT!” Aguacate yells.
“Okay, I want to showcase and act as if I am about to sacrifice someone.” Aguacate looks into the camera. “We did human sacrifice, you know.”
~
Crayola Boxx waves. “Hello!”
Crayola adjusts a picture of herself out of drag as she sits on the desk.
“This is my classroom. It’s not a traditional New Zealand Landmark, but I believe it is MY New Zealand Landmark.” Crayola grins.
Crayola spins around, dressed in a multicoloured look with tons of tassels.
“I’ve been teaching for nearly…” Crayola ponders. “10 years?”
Crayola gulps, before smiling.
“I am old.” Crayola chuckles. “But it is my creative hub. There’s two kinds of Crayola- me in drag, and me out of it.”
Crayola looks into the camera. “Now you get to see both.”
~
Fiore flicks back her hair.
“Hello, darlings.” Fiore smiles. “Welcome to Venice.”
The camera zooms out, booming as Fiore rides a gondola in the middle of the canal based city.
Fiore adjusts her long couture gown that nearly covers the entire boat.
“Whilst I am no longer the girl I once was- living here, my heart began here.” Fiore closes her eyes. “This wet city holds secrets.”
The gondola continues to flow through the small canals.
“Living here, you get used to your sea legs.” Fiore smirks. “I know how to stand on a boat, even in a couture gown in heels.”
The gondola rider gasps as he nearly hits another gondola, and Fiore holds a tight grip on it.
“See?” Fiore smirks.
~
“My grandchildren!” Granny waves.
The kids behind Granny look confused.
“Está tudo bem, crianças! Este é o show da vovó!” Granny yells.
The kids look at Granny with confusion, before hugging her.
“They haven’t seen me in drag before.” Granny says, with a smile.
Suddenly, one of the children start to cry.
“Martin, my dear Martin..” Granny picks them up.
The child continues to cry.
“Well, I think we need to get started.” Granny shrugs. “It’s authentic!”
Granny winks into the camera.
~
Haja waves in a booming undercover mine.
“Welcome to PAKISTAN!” Haja yells.
Haja holds onto a pickaxe and smiles, wearing a multi-layered look with a grin.
“I love to have my drag be beautiful, stylish. I also think at times it can be rough.”
Haja shrugs.
“What can I say, I love to shine.”
Haja touches a crystalline body of water.
“In my heart, I am a diamond under pressure. This is a historic monument… and I am the jewel.” Haja grins.
Haja holds up a crystal gem.
“For me, you will see me shine. This is the only option.” Haja grins.
~
“GIRLS!” Jaslene waves into the camera, as three other women wave.
“Hi.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene adjusts her tight little black dress.
“I have been through many things. I’ve made myself, this body, this skill from the ground up, baby.” Jaslene smirks.
Jaslene’s sisters hold onto her with a smile.
“These girls are the same. I may be the star… for now.” Jaslene smirks. “But we are the Philippines. We are proud, we are gorgeous, and we stand before you in this stage, one of my favourite venues in the world…”
Jaslene exhales.
“And I have never felt more ready to snap that shot.” Jaslene smirks.
“Take the camera out!”
~
“Welcome to the birth of civilization.” Omari smiles, breathing in the air.
A gust of wind is heard, and Omari looks into the camera.
“It’s a stampede.” Omari looks shocked, before he smirks. “Let’s run. I want pictures in action.”
Omari starts running, as the camera gets shaky.
“I BELIEVE I LIVE IN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL LAND IN THE WORLD!”
An elephant rushes past Omari.
“FOR ME, THE NATURAL ELEMENTS, THE WAY OF LIFE, THE-” Omari chuckles as he runs, the sound of hooves building and building.
“THE ANIMALS!” Omari yells. “AND I KNOW THIS. I THINK OF MYSELF AS THE KING OF SAVANNAH.”
A giraffe runs past and knocks over the camera causing it to break. Omari picks it up dramatically.
“And a survivor. No matter what.” Omari stops, eying the other animals now gone.
“For me, this is a challenge to showcase the Chief. I feel riveted. Here to win. And I hope you enjoy my world.” Omari smirks.
~
Hideyoshi laughs.
“I’m on stage!” Hideyoshi grins, looking into the camera.
“This is a local Kabuki theatre.” Hideyoshi nods. “I feel as if…” Hideyoshi stops himself.
Hideyoshi looks up, looks down… and grins.
“YES!” Hideyoshi nods. “Follow me.”
Hideyoshi walks through the theatre.
“So many doors.” Hideyoshi laughs.
Hideyoshi enters the a backstage portion of the theatre.
“Let’s do it here.” Hideyoshi nods. “WAIT!”
Hideyoshi grabs a mask and grins.
“For me, my drag, my joy is fun. And my brain doesn’t work like everyone else, I know. That’s what I THINK is my superpower.” Hideyoshi grins. “Let’s snap.”
Hideyoshi stops as the camera takes a photo at a flawed angle.
“WAIT, I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!”
~
Yasmin looks slightly nervous before the camera, before nodding.
“This is hypealicious… this is exciting…” Yasmin stands before parliament house, late, late at night.
Yasmin looks around.
“The city is still lit.” Yasmin nods. “It is… beautiful.”
Yasmin exhales.
“I live here proudly. But, the laws, the existence I have is not the same as many. I struggle, living in a society where I can’t be me.”
Yasmin sighs.
“But the reality is, this is my home.” Yasmin looks proudly. “And I believe it will be important to showcase myself.”
Yasmin sits before the steps.
“I want to show anyone who lives here, in this country- we exist, we are proud, and we do the best damn drag in the world!” Yasmin throws her hands in the air.
“Let’s do it.”
~
Zazu looks excitedly.
“AHH!” Zazu cheers.
Zazu stands in front of a ‘McQueen’ store.
“I have a story.” Zazu laughs.
Zazu giggles.
“I watched the movie CARS, and I was a huge fan. Lightning McQueen was a favourite of mine.”
Zazu winks, wearing a real couture McQueen outfit.
“I loved fashion, and McQueen was one of my faves. And I saw the movie and like, LOVED IT.”
Zazu nods.
“So, I obviously thought Lightning McQueen and Alexander McQueen were related. They aren't. SHOCKING, right?” Zazu gasps.
“In my fantasy they are one in the same!” Zazu laughs. “I love being a bit silly. I love fashion. You get a bit of both.”
Zazu giggles. “Okay, let’s do it!”
~
Each of the racers look at the camera as a producer yells.
“You’re going back onto a plane, straight onto the runway for the challenge.”
“OH MY GASPGOSHITICOUS?!” Yasmin yells.
“Bring it.” Omari smirks.
“Oooh…” Haja grins.
“THIS IS SO FUN!” Zazu laughs.
“I’m old.” Granny chuckles. “Can’t we go a little slower?!”
“Fun.” Hideyoshi smiles.
“This was supposed to be a break.” Crayola laughs.
“Fierce.” Fiore chuckles.
“I love you, girls.” Jaslene blows a kiss.
Aguacate cheers. “LET US DO IT!”
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet
2023.05.27 22:47 Totallynotshaft Anyone else here who grew so poor that fancyesque places scare them?
I grew up in a household with an abusive father . So while we did have money in retrospect , we'd only go out once a year to a restaurant and then it was the closest place around.
So now I am going out with my friends to restus and cafes which aren't high class but still fancy and I am feeling .... Weirded out?
The overly kind waiters , the nicely dressed people , the presentation and even the silly comments on the menu such as "coffee time" .
All these scare me , I feel like I'm not supposed to be there.
Part of it is that I'm still not fully set up economically and still have to watch my expenditure but damn ...
Do I fear reading french names for what is just a hamburger.
submitted by Totallynotshaft to CasualConversation [link] [comments]
So now I am going out with my friends to restus and cafes which aren't high class but still fancy and I am feeling .... Weirded out?
The overly kind waiters , the nicely dressed people , the presentation and even the silly comments on the menu such as "coffee time" .
All these scare me , I feel like I'm not supposed to be there.
Part of it is that I'm still not fully set up economically and still have to watch my expenditure but damn ...
Do I fear reading french names for what is just a hamburger.
2023.05.27 22:28 MattW22192 Big Spoon Creamery opening June 3rd
 | On June 3rd, Big Spoon Creamery is scheduled to open in the former Cookie Dough Magic space in downtown Huntsville’s The Avenue, a retail-and-residential development that includes almost 200 loft apartments and such restaurants as Melt, Purveyor and Oshi Poke Bowl and Sushi. submitted by MattW22192 to HuntsvilleAlabama [link] [comments] |
2023.05.27 21:22 WitchyOtome Do small, family-run restaurant workers hate it when you order the obligatory "safe" menu item?
There're a few small Thai restaurants that I love ordering from, but I'm always ordering the Pad Thai/Pad See Ew/other menu item clearly meant for non-Thai people. They're absolutely delicious and I tip well, but I'm always slightly embarrassed by ordering "less authentic" food. They've been nothing but polite and friendly, though.
For reference, I have quite a few food sensitivities (thanks Crohns disease ♡) but I don't usually disclose this information when I order food. I just really like the dishes and luckily it's safe for me to eat. Should I even be worried?
submitted by WitchyOtome to NoStupidQuestions [link] [comments]
For reference, I have quite a few food sensitivities (thanks Crohns disease ♡) but I don't usually disclose this information when I order food. I just really like the dishes and luckily it's safe for me to eat. Should I even be worried?
2023.05.27 21:20 Practical_Awareness4 I’m tipping less if…
I’m tipping less if I have to not only browse the menu but also order my food and pay in advance on my phone. I’m tipping less if u barely come back except to give me the food which I ordered on my phone. I’m tipping less because you didn’t give me my bill or ask me if I wanted any desert because I had to pay in advance on my effing phone.
That’s a 15 percent tip. Eff 20+ percent with less effort.
I’ll reveal which restaurant if y’all want.
submitted by Practical_Awareness4 to washingtondc [link] [comments]
That’s a 15 percent tip. Eff 20+ percent with less effort.
I’ll reveal which restaurant if y’all want.
2023.05.27 21:14 Mommymilkieslover69- (i'm not getting paid for this) Go check out Khao. It's a thai food place on the lisburn road. Small family owned restaurant, cheap food, massive portions and loaded with flavour. Staff are lovely, very understand of my speech impediment. 10/10, really worth checking out
submitted by Mommymilkieslover69- to Belfast [link] [comments]
2023.05.27 20:34 lukeigi_3 Why fast food mascots are dying.
Is it just me or does it seem like many famous fast food restaurants are no longer having mascots. This is something that has been happening for many huge fast food restaurants like McDonald’s, Burger King, Taco Bell and many more have been discontinued.
Let’s start with McDonald’s who once had Ronald McDonald. He was created in the 60s to improve McDonald’s sales towards kids. Thought he really took off when McDonald land was introduced. Many years passed but in the early 2000s McDonald’s faced controversy for health issues and Ronald was part for advertising to kids. While he wasn’t discontinued due to that as he lasted a few more years he was eventually discontinued due to creepy clown videos on YouTube.
Another is the Burger King from the restaurant of the same name. He was with the company for a while being on the sign and used in commercials but in the 70s they introduced a version closer to what we know today who could do magic tricks to rival McDonald land. Eventually he was also discontinued and replaced by the kids club before they were discontinued. They reintroduced him in the late 2000s to promote there breakfast menu. But just recently they removed him from they’re marketing and if I had to guess it may have to do with there new marketing campaign.
It’s not like they are completely dead like there’s big boy from big boy the star from Carl’s JHardee’s and jollibee from jollibee but you get the picture. Also some companies don’t even have mascots like Starbucks,Panda Express,raising canes and many more
submitted by lukeigi_3 to mascots [link] [comments]
Let’s start with McDonald’s who once had Ronald McDonald. He was created in the 60s to improve McDonald’s sales towards kids. Thought he really took off when McDonald land was introduced. Many years passed but in the early 2000s McDonald’s faced controversy for health issues and Ronald was part for advertising to kids. While he wasn’t discontinued due to that as he lasted a few more years he was eventually discontinued due to creepy clown videos on YouTube.
Another is the Burger King from the restaurant of the same name. He was with the company for a while being on the sign and used in commercials but in the 70s they introduced a version closer to what we know today who could do magic tricks to rival McDonald land. Eventually he was also discontinued and replaced by the kids club before they were discontinued. They reintroduced him in the late 2000s to promote there breakfast menu. But just recently they removed him from they’re marketing and if I had to guess it may have to do with there new marketing campaign.
It’s not like they are completely dead like there’s big boy from big boy the star from Carl’s JHardee’s and jollibee from jollibee but you get the picture. Also some companies don’t even have mascots like Starbucks,Panda Express,raising canes and many more
2023.05.27 20:31 FarmWhich4275 Everyone Loves Uncle Bernie
The tension hung heavy in the air as it was finally realized that peace talks were collapsing and war was inevitable. Tyraxis, Hive Prince of Corsica faction had gathered here for a modicum of peace hoping to avoid the losses of his men. He sat in his chair opposite his former brethren with his two Praetorians flanking him, plasma spears at ready. His human diplomat, Johnny was desperately trying to ease tensions. Arborean, the Crown Prince of Hive Arrakkis sat proud at his seat, his purple skin glistening in the light of the room.
Arborean was so certain of his victory he had the barefaced audacity to carry his human concubine with him. His human diplomat Martinez was unamused by tensions as he cast passing glances to the Praetorians flanking his employer. Arborean made sure to prominently display his most prized possession with the woman sitting on his lap.
"Surely we can find a way around this? There has to be a way to sue for peace. At least for this battle. Perhaps we can exclude some ships from the roster and at least make it an even fight?" Johnny could sense he was getting nowhere, but he still had a few angles.
"Sure... we can sue for peace. AFTER you hand over the system! Those Gehennan spice mines are ours and you damn well know it!" Martinez slammed his hand on the table.
"You and I both know that if that fleet goes to battle it would be an absolute slaughter! If your master was half the warrior he so claims he is, he would agree to roster the battle to make it fair!" Johnny blasted his opponent.
Arborean whispered into his diplomats ear. The shame tactic and personal attack worked. "A point made in anger but still a point. We will agree to the standard galactic Ship Points Allocation system. However... No holds barred. Last man standing rules only." Martinez said with a certain sinister grin.
Tyraxis hung his head in shame. The Queen would have his head after this one way or another for this, but at least it would give his men a fighting chance. He gave a nod to Johnny and sent him a note on his wearable data manager. "Fine. If we win, you will not come back to this system. The point was proven, tactics ruled the day. If we win, you leave and don't come back!"
Arborean thought for a moment then nodded his head. "Deal." Martinez said, extending a hand out.
Martinez and Johnny shook hands and started drawing up paperwork as Arborean began to greedily fondle his prized possession, much to the blistering rage of Tyraxis burning eyes. Suddenly the door flung itself open, a human marine barged through the door.
"UNCLE BERNIE'S HERE!!!!" He yelled with unimaginable excitement, and charged back out again.
"Uncle Bernie!?" All three of the humans said this at once, and all three, suddenly got up from where they stood and bolted to the exit with such speed it made everyone's heads spin.
A few moments of awkward and stunned silence followed this occurrence. "What the hell is an uncle Bernie?" Arborean asked, as if expecting an answer.
"Well... Uncle is a human term, it means the brother of my father. Bernie is I believe someone's name." On of Tyraxis' Praetorians said.
The two princes regarded each other for a moment longer before one of Tyraxis' Praetorians broke the silence as his communicator beeped. "My Prince... every human ship in the system has disengaged!"
"WHAT!?" Both Princes yelled out in unison.
"Warp signature detected! There is a battlecruiser class vessel entering the system!" Arboreans Praetorian warned.
"What treachery are you planning Thraxis?!" Arborean lashed out.
"What are you talking about? This is YOUR doing! How much did you bribe my ambassador hm?"
Just then, an interruption. Every communications unit on the station suddenly came to life. It was some kind of... song? Silly, whimsical. Catchy.
"Are ya lost in space?
Need pie in your face?
Come on down to Bernies!
Do ya need a drink?
Well thats a sinch!
Come on down to Bernie's!
Bernies Bar and Grill is now open, active servicemen get a beer on the house!"
All of the Hivers on station and on their ships stood with absolute bewilderment as to what the flaming hell was going on. In the meantime, a very familiar looking ship warped into the system, drowned out by a cheering crowd as all of the twelve human made ships in the system swarmed it and docked as soon as it was safe.
Thraxis stood from his seat and made his way to the exit. "And just where do you think you are going?" Arborean said with annoyance.
"Beer."
Thraxis moved down the concourse ramp to his shuttle and waited as his Praetorian Guard, and hastily at their heels, Arborean and his guards, caught up and sat down. Thraxis called the robotic driver to go to the Human ship 'Uncle Bernies'. The driver, a machine, let out a happy beep for some reason and with careless abandon charged his way to the ship.
Uncle Bernies was a battlecruiser class. The six Hivers took careful note of its exterior. It was several times larger than most Human warships, and ten times more heavily armed. Mounted in various spots were storage tanks that looked like distilleries and one could clearly see the ship had its own hydroponics and protien synthesis bays built into the hull. The human support ships had been completely emptied by the time the shuttle made it to one of the airlocks.
The robot driver let out a mechanical "Woohoo!" as it hopped out of its car and hastily wheeled its way into the ships maintenance bays. Even the machines were entranced by this ship. The six hivers made their way through the clearly marked hallways into a massive restaurant. Immediately they were surrounded by humans of all classes and types who immediately reacted to their presence with a loud "AHOY MATEY!" of approval before returning to the meals they were enjoying.
The restaurant had over two hundred humans in it, but could comfortably seat a thousand more. The place was a massive circular arnoretum, surrounded on every corner by restaurants, eateries and even a quaint little gift shop.
"What in the Queens tits is this place?" One of Thraxis' Preatorians thought aloud.
"I can answer that my man! Welcome to my humble restaurant and bar!" A human suddenly spoke up from behind the group.
The six turned around to the sight of a grey bearded human with a large midsection, a toolbelt with cooking utensiils in a strange uniform with a funny hat. "Who are you?"
"Im uncle Bernie! Shut yer holes and drink a beer! Activer servicemen get one free beer!" He excitedly said, then jammed a purple aluminium can into everyones hands.
At this point Thraxis was what humans would call 'done.' so, he took a taste of the beverage. "My goodness!" His expression instantly changed to one of happiness as he drank more.
Arborean timidly took a sip of his own can of beer. "By the Mother!" He exclaimed, then chugged the rest of it down with a fist raised high.
Bernie regarded his new customers with a hearty smile and lead them all to a table before serving them a pizza. Within a few moments of them sitting down, Arboreans concubine Jessica returned to her masters lap with flushed cheeks and a silly giggle. The two ambassadors arrived as well, carrying a family size two cheese pizza with mushroom, onion and smoked ham. Jessiica showed them how to eat a pizza by grabbing a slice, then squealing in delight as she tasted the slice. Martinez and Johnny likewise did the same, sighing in happiness as though it was their first christmas.
The hivers tentatively took their own slice of the delicious smelling confection and took a small, cautious bite. Thraxis gave it one taste and threw decorum to the wind and began to aggressively scarf the slice down. The four Praetorians likewise did the same, followed by Arborean who had Jessica feed it to him.
Thraxis sat back in his seat, carefully considering a small fact he suddenly noticed. This place was rather... empty. Uncle Bernie approached and smiled his usual moustachio'ed smile. "Can I get ya anything else boys? Theres plenty for all!"
Thraxis suddenly perked up. "Yes... Olokarn." He looked at his all too happy Preatorian guard.
"Yes My -burp- Prince?" He said.
"Hand me your communicator, patch me into the fleet."
Olokarn did as commanded. "This is Thraxis, Prince of Hive Khathorn. All ships are to immediately disengage operations and report to Uncle Bernie's for lunch." He stopped, after Johnny handed him a piece of napkin with something scrawled on it. "And also... anyone who does not leave a tip, will be shot."
Arborean followed suit, commanding his own substantial naval forces and military to stand down, placing several thousand take-out orders for the planet and station at Martinez' instructions.
Within minutes, the ship was flooded with a thousand Hivers from both factions. To Arborean and Thraxis' astonished shock, Uncle Bernie was there to meet them. All of them. Thraxis noted this and asked Martinez what the hell was going on.
"What, My Lord?" Martinez asked, confused.
"Th-theres Uncle Bernie. And there! And there too! Am I seeing a strange genetic anomaly or is this man a clone?" He said bewildered.
"Well... yah. Thats uncle Bernie there. And there. And there too. And thats... thats Frank actually. Hes Uncle Bernie too but he likes to be called Frank." Martinez said, gesturing to the chefs and cooks of all the various restaurants.
"Care to elaborate? Please?" Arborean said as he held a sleeping Jessica in his arms.
"Uncle Bernie, My Prince, is a human that owned and operated a restaurant at an old shipbuilding yard before Sol was lost called Jupiter Drive Yards. After about twenty years on the job with that very rerstaurant, the company gave him one of our old Refurbished Munificent Class Ornament ships. Thats what this ship is. Its based on an old Trade federation Munificent class in old Star Wars movies." Martinez explained, sitting down with a new can of beer.
"MMmyes, a lot of other restaurants and food franchises exist, but none come close to Bernie's. He turned that ship into a roving restaurant and was there when Sol collapsed. Hes been everywhere. Just roams the stars, feeding and hydrating anyone he comes across at an absolutely rock bottom price. He even caters to machine consciousness because the tech cults have a presence on this ship. All in all, Bernie is just a nice guy, who just wants to own a restaurant. And damn does he do a good job!" Johnny responded in kind as he helped himself to a hotdog.
"And in order to ensure I can provide the service that is needed, nay, demanded of my establishment, I opted to do some cloning and mind copying, just to keep it all running how it needs to be! We share somewhat of a gestalt consciousness too so... it makes things a lot easier. Now, perhaps I can interest anyone in our dessert menu?" Uncle Bernie said, firing up the ice cream makers and waffle irons.
In the end, with all that had happened, neither side was ready or willing to engage in warfare. Both sides were either too full, too sleepy, or too drunk to do any fighting. When the hangovers and bellyaches passed, there was a strange feeling of contentedness between the two factions. Both of them essentially forgot why they were fighting and were too stuffed, happy or filled up to bother asking.
Martinez and Johnny drew up plans for the conflict anyway but they were never used. In all, Arborean and Thraxis agreed to a fifty-fifty split o resources in the star system ultimately benefitting everyone. Especially Bernie. One of the conditions of peace talks, was that Bernie always come round at least once every three months for a good booze up.
Because after all, everyone loves Uncle Bernie!
submitted by FarmWhich4275 to HFY [link] [comments]
Arborean was so certain of his victory he had the barefaced audacity to carry his human concubine with him. His human diplomat Martinez was unamused by tensions as he cast passing glances to the Praetorians flanking his employer. Arborean made sure to prominently display his most prized possession with the woman sitting on his lap.
"Surely we can find a way around this? There has to be a way to sue for peace. At least for this battle. Perhaps we can exclude some ships from the roster and at least make it an even fight?" Johnny could sense he was getting nowhere, but he still had a few angles.
"Sure... we can sue for peace. AFTER you hand over the system! Those Gehennan spice mines are ours and you damn well know it!" Martinez slammed his hand on the table.
"You and I both know that if that fleet goes to battle it would be an absolute slaughter! If your master was half the warrior he so claims he is, he would agree to roster the battle to make it fair!" Johnny blasted his opponent.
Arborean whispered into his diplomats ear. The shame tactic and personal attack worked. "A point made in anger but still a point. We will agree to the standard galactic Ship Points Allocation system. However... No holds barred. Last man standing rules only." Martinez said with a certain sinister grin.
Tyraxis hung his head in shame. The Queen would have his head after this one way or another for this, but at least it would give his men a fighting chance. He gave a nod to Johnny and sent him a note on his wearable data manager. "Fine. If we win, you will not come back to this system. The point was proven, tactics ruled the day. If we win, you leave and don't come back!"
Arborean thought for a moment then nodded his head. "Deal." Martinez said, extending a hand out.
Martinez and Johnny shook hands and started drawing up paperwork as Arborean began to greedily fondle his prized possession, much to the blistering rage of Tyraxis burning eyes. Suddenly the door flung itself open, a human marine barged through the door.
"UNCLE BERNIE'S HERE!!!!" He yelled with unimaginable excitement, and charged back out again.
"Uncle Bernie!?" All three of the humans said this at once, and all three, suddenly got up from where they stood and bolted to the exit with such speed it made everyone's heads spin.
A few moments of awkward and stunned silence followed this occurrence. "What the hell is an uncle Bernie?" Arborean asked, as if expecting an answer.
"Well... Uncle is a human term, it means the brother of my father. Bernie is I believe someone's name." On of Tyraxis' Praetorians said.
The two princes regarded each other for a moment longer before one of Tyraxis' Praetorians broke the silence as his communicator beeped. "My Prince... every human ship in the system has disengaged!"
"WHAT!?" Both Princes yelled out in unison.
"Warp signature detected! There is a battlecruiser class vessel entering the system!" Arboreans Praetorian warned.
"What treachery are you planning Thraxis?!" Arborean lashed out.
"What are you talking about? This is YOUR doing! How much did you bribe my ambassador hm?"
Just then, an interruption. Every communications unit on the station suddenly came to life. It was some kind of... song? Silly, whimsical. Catchy.
"Are ya lost in space?
Need pie in your face?
Come on down to Bernies!
Do ya need a drink?
Well thats a sinch!
Come on down to Bernie's!
Bernies Bar and Grill is now open, active servicemen get a beer on the house!"
All of the Hivers on station and on their ships stood with absolute bewilderment as to what the flaming hell was going on. In the meantime, a very familiar looking ship warped into the system, drowned out by a cheering crowd as all of the twelve human made ships in the system swarmed it and docked as soon as it was safe.
Thraxis stood from his seat and made his way to the exit. "And just where do you think you are going?" Arborean said with annoyance.
"Beer."
Thraxis moved down the concourse ramp to his shuttle and waited as his Praetorian Guard, and hastily at their heels, Arborean and his guards, caught up and sat down. Thraxis called the robotic driver to go to the Human ship 'Uncle Bernies'. The driver, a machine, let out a happy beep for some reason and with careless abandon charged his way to the ship.
Uncle Bernies was a battlecruiser class. The six Hivers took careful note of its exterior. It was several times larger than most Human warships, and ten times more heavily armed. Mounted in various spots were storage tanks that looked like distilleries and one could clearly see the ship had its own hydroponics and protien synthesis bays built into the hull. The human support ships had been completely emptied by the time the shuttle made it to one of the airlocks.
The robot driver let out a mechanical "Woohoo!" as it hopped out of its car and hastily wheeled its way into the ships maintenance bays. Even the machines were entranced by this ship. The six hivers made their way through the clearly marked hallways into a massive restaurant. Immediately they were surrounded by humans of all classes and types who immediately reacted to their presence with a loud "AHOY MATEY!" of approval before returning to the meals they were enjoying.
The restaurant had over two hundred humans in it, but could comfortably seat a thousand more. The place was a massive circular arnoretum, surrounded on every corner by restaurants, eateries and even a quaint little gift shop.
"What in the Queens tits is this place?" One of Thraxis' Preatorians thought aloud.
"I can answer that my man! Welcome to my humble restaurant and bar!" A human suddenly spoke up from behind the group.
The six turned around to the sight of a grey bearded human with a large midsection, a toolbelt with cooking utensiils in a strange uniform with a funny hat. "Who are you?"
"Im uncle Bernie! Shut yer holes and drink a beer! Activer servicemen get one free beer!" He excitedly said, then jammed a purple aluminium can into everyones hands.
At this point Thraxis was what humans would call 'done.' so, he took a taste of the beverage. "My goodness!" His expression instantly changed to one of happiness as he drank more.
Arborean timidly took a sip of his own can of beer. "By the Mother!" He exclaimed, then chugged the rest of it down with a fist raised high.
Bernie regarded his new customers with a hearty smile and lead them all to a table before serving them a pizza. Within a few moments of them sitting down, Arboreans concubine Jessica returned to her masters lap with flushed cheeks and a silly giggle. The two ambassadors arrived as well, carrying a family size two cheese pizza with mushroom, onion and smoked ham. Jessiica showed them how to eat a pizza by grabbing a slice, then squealing in delight as she tasted the slice. Martinez and Johnny likewise did the same, sighing in happiness as though it was their first christmas.
The hivers tentatively took their own slice of the delicious smelling confection and took a small, cautious bite. Thraxis gave it one taste and threw decorum to the wind and began to aggressively scarf the slice down. The four Praetorians likewise did the same, followed by Arborean who had Jessica feed it to him.
Thraxis sat back in his seat, carefully considering a small fact he suddenly noticed. This place was rather... empty. Uncle Bernie approached and smiled his usual moustachio'ed smile. "Can I get ya anything else boys? Theres plenty for all!"
Thraxis suddenly perked up. "Yes... Olokarn." He looked at his all too happy Preatorian guard.
"Yes My -burp- Prince?" He said.
"Hand me your communicator, patch me into the fleet."
Olokarn did as commanded. "This is Thraxis, Prince of Hive Khathorn. All ships are to immediately disengage operations and report to Uncle Bernie's for lunch." He stopped, after Johnny handed him a piece of napkin with something scrawled on it. "And also... anyone who does not leave a tip, will be shot."
Arborean followed suit, commanding his own substantial naval forces and military to stand down, placing several thousand take-out orders for the planet and station at Martinez' instructions.
Within minutes, the ship was flooded with a thousand Hivers from both factions. To Arborean and Thraxis' astonished shock, Uncle Bernie was there to meet them. All of them. Thraxis noted this and asked Martinez what the hell was going on.
"What, My Lord?" Martinez asked, confused.
"Th-theres Uncle Bernie. And there! And there too! Am I seeing a strange genetic anomaly or is this man a clone?" He said bewildered.
"Well... yah. Thats uncle Bernie there. And there. And there too. And thats... thats Frank actually. Hes Uncle Bernie too but he likes to be called Frank." Martinez said, gesturing to the chefs and cooks of all the various restaurants.
"Care to elaborate? Please?" Arborean said as he held a sleeping Jessica in his arms.
"Uncle Bernie, My Prince, is a human that owned and operated a restaurant at an old shipbuilding yard before Sol was lost called Jupiter Drive Yards. After about twenty years on the job with that very rerstaurant, the company gave him one of our old Refurbished Munificent Class Ornament ships. Thats what this ship is. Its based on an old Trade federation Munificent class in old Star Wars movies." Martinez explained, sitting down with a new can of beer.
"MMmyes, a lot of other restaurants and food franchises exist, but none come close to Bernie's. He turned that ship into a roving restaurant and was there when Sol collapsed. Hes been everywhere. Just roams the stars, feeding and hydrating anyone he comes across at an absolutely rock bottom price. He even caters to machine consciousness because the tech cults have a presence on this ship. All in all, Bernie is just a nice guy, who just wants to own a restaurant. And damn does he do a good job!" Johnny responded in kind as he helped himself to a hotdog.
"And in order to ensure I can provide the service that is needed, nay, demanded of my establishment, I opted to do some cloning and mind copying, just to keep it all running how it needs to be! We share somewhat of a gestalt consciousness too so... it makes things a lot easier. Now, perhaps I can interest anyone in our dessert menu?" Uncle Bernie said, firing up the ice cream makers and waffle irons.
In the end, with all that had happened, neither side was ready or willing to engage in warfare. Both sides were either too full, too sleepy, or too drunk to do any fighting. When the hangovers and bellyaches passed, there was a strange feeling of contentedness between the two factions. Both of them essentially forgot why they were fighting and were too stuffed, happy or filled up to bother asking.
Martinez and Johnny drew up plans for the conflict anyway but they were never used. In all, Arborean and Thraxis agreed to a fifty-fifty split o resources in the star system ultimately benefitting everyone. Especially Bernie. One of the conditions of peace talks, was that Bernie always come round at least once every three months for a good booze up.
Because after all, everyone loves Uncle Bernie!
2023.05.27 20:17 JuliaCandySweet The most delicious restaurant. Sushi is excellent. Today is my grandmother's birthday. We celebrated at home with a Napoleon cake. And then we went to a restaurant to eat sushi.
 | submitted by JuliaCandySweet to sushi [link] [comments] |