✨ Sunday Vibes

Vibe check! How’s your week been? What are you reading, watching, or listening to?
During Sunday Vibes, members share what they've been up to and other media they're enjoying. It's a space to get to know one another outside of romance books.

📰 Sunday Gloss

Here in the Sunday Gloss, we highlight the sub’s vibes each week, including announcements and great discussions.

✍🏼 Regular Features

😱 WTF Wednesdays - A weekly feature posted Wednesdays to share the stuff in Romancelandia that makes you go WTF: bad takes, questionable metaphors, anything that left you speechless.
🍿 Fresh Faves Fridays - A weekly feature posted Fridays to share your 4- and 5-star reads and favorite quotes. Think of it as a What Did You Read This Week? thread, but with only the best books.
💩 Shitpost Saturdays - On Saturdays, we loosen the discussion-based requirement to allow for memes, shower thoughts, silly posts, etc. All other rules still remain.
⭐️ Our April Monthly Reading Recap is up here! Members share their top/bottom 5 reads of the month on first Tuesdays. Next Recap is on Tue, June 6.

💬 Discussions We Loved

We encourage you to create stand-alone posts for your thought-provoking questions, so they get more visibility and engagement. As a reminder, posts here do not need to be a dissertation, only discussion-based (aside from Shitpost Saturdays). Book requests should remain in the Daily Chat unless they are part of a discussion post.

• u/napamy prompted a discussion on the worst “_____ meets _____” marketing blurbs for romance books.
  
• u/DrGirlfriend47 crowdsourced reciples vital to the plot of romances.
  
• u/OrdinaryDust195 started a discussion on books you simultaneously enjoy and are frustrated by
  
• u/WhatWhoNoShe asked us What bad and weird anatomy have you read in romance?
  
• u/1028ad shared a meme Mood readers leaving for a trip before ebooks were a thing
  

When it landed on the ground it moved once and immediately died, Im not nearly far enough in my practice to understand what this means or if it even means anything. My mom started singing the Stevie nicks song after it happened and it reminded me that I should ask the community what y’all think. I already had a supremely emotionally charged and frustrating day, so with how wrong my own energy has felt today it’s almost an uncomfortably fitting end to the evening.. Im gonna try to do my own looking into it but any thoughts & opinions are extremely appreciated.

I’m 37 weeks pregnant and struggling with my mental health due to the hormones, especially during this final trimester. And for the past week or two I’ve become obsessively jealous over my partner’s ex best friend (28f).
Rewind to 2019. At the time it’d only been a couple of years since I’d come out of a relationship where my ex had cheated on me with his best friend. I had a new partner, Sam, and things were going well, but we had been together a year or so when I noticed on Instagram that he had commented “😍” on a picture of his (then) best friend and colleague, Hannah.
I’d previously felt a bit uncomfortable about their relationship. She was undeniably gorgeous and he mentioned things like sleeping in the same bed as her when he stayed round hers once. But I challenged this and was very aware of my anxiety due to my past relationship.
Something about the emoji comment tipped me over the edge though. I was triggered and acted totally out of line, searching his phone for evidence that he had feelings for her.
What I found is that he was potentially once attracted to her, when they first met. It seemed like her been on the edge of trying to hook up with her, and had found her physically attractive. All of this was pieced together from somewhat flaky evidence, e.g. a friend had texted him saying “any updates on you and Hannah?” “we’ll find you a Hannah lookalike.” He’d also told a friend he’d sleep with her in a “shag, marry, cruise” scenario pitched at him - worth noting I don’t know who the marry person was.
What I think probably happened is that when they first met he was physically attracted to her and then perhaps as they got to know each other the attraction faded, to the point where they became just good friends. This is just me guessing as he’s always maintained he never had romantic feelings for her at all.
Unfortunately I didn’t do that kind of rationalisation at the time and I insisted he cut her out despite his protests that the comment was harmless and that he didn’t have feelings for her.
Anyway cut forward 3 years and we’re now pregnant with our first. I thought we’d worked through all of this and I’d got better - I’ve not felt as much anxiety or jealousy when he’s had female friends, we’ve been to couples therapy, I’ve reflected internally and talked with my partner about how wrong it was of me to pressure him to end the friendship. I’d even suggested he get back in touch with Hannah and explain what happened (which he chose not to).
But in the past couple of weeks pregnancy hormones have got my anxiety rocketing, and all of a sudden out of nowhere I felt that pang of jealousy, about Hannah again.
I’ve thought about her and the messages I saw two years ago nearly constantly, to the point where it’s distracting me from focusing on my own well-being, the pregnancy and upcoming birth of the baby. I’ve had to work so hard to stop myself taking his phone and checking it again.
I’ve just come here to get a bit of advice on how I can put these feelings aside. I’ve tried meditation, rationalising it, exercise to distract myself. Nothings worked. I’m devastated that what I thought had been progress and maturing on my part has seemingly disappeared. I’m anxious that I might spend the last few days of my pregnancy obsessing over something I know is so pointless. I’m also very worried about these obtrusive thoughts disrupting my labour, birth or first few weeks with my new baby.
I feel ashamed and ridiculous and I don’t really know what to do. Any advice much appreciated. Thank you in advance.
TL; DR: I’m 37 weeks pregnant and have become obsessively jealous with someone who I think my partner was attracted to a few years ago. I don’t know how to stop myself obsessing and move on from the jealousy which damaged an important friendship for him and has the potential to affect our relationship, my labour and birth, and precious first few experiences with my first baby.

Hello! I’m starting echange studies in Sendai the coming autumn. My family will be joining me during christmas break. I’m looking for an apartment close to Senzan Line. Is there good playgrounds near any stations? It would be helpfull for my wife and kids if there was a place to spend time during days. Thank you for any replies.

To preface - We’re by no means poor, we don’t have money issues, we have a place and both have good jobs. I’m not what you’d call a cuck either.
We’re both 29 and met in college. She is Chinese and her friend does it and said that there is a high demand for Asian sugar babies and sugar daddies pay upwards to $1000-$1500 per visit. She is great at communicating with me and wouldn’t do anything without my knowledge so it’s all very transparent and she lets me look at all of the seeking app messages if I want so there isn’t a trust issue or anything. We even have had a threesome with one of her female friends so she isn’t the jealous type of girl by any means and she has told me if I wanted to hook up with a girl that’s ok because to her it’s just sex and not love making. We have a great relationship and have traveled the world together and she is a wonderful partner but the idea of her having a sugar daddy throws me off in two ways. Like one: it’s kind of hot and ego inflating knowing that people think my fiancé is so attractive and sweet that they’re willing to spend $1500 to sleep with her using a condom, at a hotel, without sleeping over (her and I discussed boundaries like condom only, public meeting, Ubers, and hotels only) but reason two: I’m the kind of person who might be jealous and think sex is more than just sex. She said she wouldn’t do it if it makes me uncomfortable and would respect my wishes, but she wants to use the money to make OUR future better. Like she would have more money to invest into retirement funds, take us on more extravagant vacations, it could go towards bills etc so on paper it’s not a bad thing. She told me I’m the only person who she loves and would ever love so I know where her heart is. Idk I’m just kind of venting because I have nobody else to tell this to… are there any guys out there whose significant others do this, Or sugar babies who have significant other that can give me just some insight or tell me how it can impact a relationship? Also, since she has been floating this idea around our sex life has improved 10x. Idk I’m just rambling and have mixed feelings and would love some help/insight.
Thanks

Hi all, I was remising on my childhood living situation. (Looking to buy my first home after years of saving) I have always lived in a semi-dethatched house in a decent area. I was wondering how the housing executive works, as I remember a particular family who have not worked ever (Alcoholics claiming benefits, literally all them ) All living near me (rent free) in a lovely 3 storey 5 bedroom detached house. How is this fair when working people struggle to pay rent and wasters live rent free without worry? I remember the younger child always being sent to school (stinking of smoke and stained uniform) with no money and being forced to steal from shops/friends to get by. Meanwhile this dudes Mother drank multiple bottles of Buckfast and packets a cigarettes a day.

I know fallout 4 is just set 10 years after fallout 3, but in fallout 3 merchants and pack Brahmin can be seen carrying the stuff. I feel as though caravans would easily be able to be moved in or around the Boston area. I mean it’s a near infinite source of water, it would make sense those who receive a lot of it would want to make a buck selling it. This leads me to believe that the canonical ending to 3 has someone fuck up aqua pura and project purity somehow.

I’m (20f) a caregiver at a group home and I just started working here barely a month ago. I’ve been doing everything correctly but my co-workers keep on asking about my boyfriend (24m) and it’s gotten to the point where I’m scared my job is in jeopardy.
For context, my boyfriend drives me to and from work and parks outside while I’m working (I work the graveyard shift). He does not feel comfortable going back to my home without me due to some conflict between him and my parents (who we’re staying with until we have enough money to find a place) and the fact that it’s about a 35-40 mile drive one way (70-80 round trip, if he were to go back home it would be around 140-160 miles per day and we don’t have the money to pay for that kind of gas). Also note he’s comfortable staying out in the car and sleeping in it as needed, his car is his treasure. He does not enter or go near the house I’m working in at all and does not come in contact with anything related to the house.
Moving on… it all started when a co-worker commented about a guy parking across the street and sitting in his car, in which I let her know that it was my ride and he was waiting to come pick me up. I didn’t think much of it since it’s just conversation and I didn’t think my boyfriend being parked across the street would be a big deal. She started asking more questions about it, like if I had a DL, my own car, why he was out there waiting for me, ect. I answered all the questions honestly and we moved on.
The next day two other co-workers bring it up and they both tell me, “Don’t bring him inside, it’s not your house, we need to respect people’s privacy and it’s not appropriate”, and they went on for about 5 minutes about it. I know it’s related to another situation regarding another employee who got put in suspension for that exact thing happening (plus some worse stuff happened relating the person’s partner after entering the house but I won’t elaborate on it), but every day that I have worked either Management has notified me or another co-worker, each time getting more aggressive. While having these conversations I also added that it’s a HIPAA Violation to do so and that neither my boyfriend or I are interested in doing anything close to that. Today at work about an hour after my shift started one of my co-workers (not on the schedule today) pulled up to the house, sat in his car for like 5 minutes and then drove off. My boyfriend texted me telling me about this and I feel very uncomfortable being here. Maybe I’m just being paranoid, but I really do feel like people are gossiping about me and it’s going to lead to an unlawful investigation with suspension and potentially getting fired even though I didn’t do anything wrong. I’m thinking of calling HR when I get off work although I’m unsure of whether that’ll actually help. What should I do?
Edit: The co-worker that pulled up was not scheduled for today. I truly believe it’s because he or someone else who works here wanted to spy on me or something and check to see if I was actually telling the truth. :/

i’ve been best friends with my best friend rn since childhood and growing up she’s always been known for being rlly pretty by our pri sch classmates, and our guy classmates would only talk to me to ask stuff abt her since they had crushes on her. in sec sch she got a major glow up; looks, fashion, interests, and even attitude which ultimately led to more guys liking her as well. there are times when we go out and some of the staff at shops would prioritise he treat her better and even give her discounts!!!!!! it used to not bother me but since we’re nearing adulthood i realise how much easier things are for her because of her beauty and how likeable she is compared to me :( we’re also complete opposites in terms of background, personality, and interests, but overall she gets along well with others more. obviously this is not her fault, she really is charismatic and an amazing friend but i can’t help but beat myself over these things. what do i do?? 😵‍💫

For context. I used to weigh nearly 300 pounds. 275 pounds to be exact. Today I weight 185 pounds. Though I have a lot more work to do, I’ve done the grunt of the work in the past two and a half years.
I used to always get teased for being fat as fuck. Girls and guys were not nice about it sometimes, but the ones that were I’ll never forget. Being overweight and obese took over my life as I ate food constantly to compensate for negative emotions and feelings and rejection.
Today, I feel confident, and sexy honestly. I’ve hit the gym and eaten really well and the results have paid off. People that knew me before are so much nicer to me now, but people that are just meeting me, it almost feels like they treat me like I’m still fat. Does that make sense?
Friends and girls I’ve dated always have this notion that I get a ton of girls but that is not the reality. I’m funny, and I make people laugh, I’ve always been pretty confident despite always being fat, and now that I’ve lost nearly 100 pounds I’m more confident. I never try to be cocky, or act like a dick, but I have a great personality and my friends and family really love me. So how is it I am as lonely as I am? I try to find something meaningful, without overextending and obsessing over it, but I am getting lonely guys :/
In regards to dating and relationships, I am finding it so hard to put myself in a good position to date. When I was overweight and obese, I was dating often and was hooking up with women way more frequently than I am now. I don’t know why that is. Though I’ve changed my body, I don’t feel as though my personality has changed so much. Maybe I was more off the charts back then, and I’m more self aware and mindful now than I used to be, but at this point I thought I’d be seeing more women show me love and affection. But when I go out with them or talk to them to initiate it, it’s constant rejection. I’ve only asked about three women out that I was considering seriously being with, but I’m not having any luck. I’m getting lonely and I’m starved of affection.
I’d be lying if I said looks weren’t important to me, but the truth is, any nice woman to me is already really pretty for the most part. Just because they’re nice. I don’t care if they’re white, black, Asian, latinX… have money or not, as long as they got their shit together or are working on it, i find them attractive.
Should I be trying to approach and meet more people? I’ve deleted the dating apps because they don’t work for me. Is it because I’m ugly? Or asian? I don’t personally think I’m ugly but I’ve heard many times in my life girls won’t date me because I’m asian. Which sucks but it is what it is. So please give me some advice or insight as to what I can or should do.
Thank you for reading.

When do I determine if this is a hot flash or something more serious? Sweat has been dripping off me for 2 FULL days of a continuous hot flash and I'm not sure I can take much more 😭🤬 temp is currently only 50° with humidity at 75% so I don't think that's the issue. I'm suffering from minor seasonal allergies but not too bad and it's never caused sweating before.

Feel like this question sums up my thinking, but I hate that I asked that latter part of it. I'm dealing with what I feel like is conflict at work, and I just don't know what to do about it.
I think the best way to describe my job is to say I'm a government contractor. My organization is separate and independent, but we work for and with different government agencies. These people sit on our boards and committees, and they are even involved in the hiring process. It's a close relationship where they act as our "clients" and, thus, "bosses". Though, I have my own boss within my actual organization, and that's typically who we really on as the final say on things.
My boss has had issues with a few of these so-called clients. It's never amounted to much, but it can absolutely cause tension. It has even caused tension with me because my boss will okay something, I'll do it, but then the clients will get upset and take it out on me. This has only happened with one person in particular, but it has happened twice. They have pretty knee-jerk reactions, so once they take a second to actually talk through whatever it was with us, the issue goes away. But like I said, it's happened twice now, and I feel like things are awkward. They barely acknowledge me at in-person meetings and conferences, and whenever I do try to initiate conversation, it's quick and tense. A little "hi how are you" and then the move on to have greater conversations with my coworkers as I'm standing right there, even with my boss.
Now what brings me to post this is that someone this person works with is now being weird with me. They're doing same things as the first person, but just a few months ago, they were giving me advice. Empathizing with me because my work load is huge right now, bigger than any of my coworkers. Any consideration of that seems to have just gone away, and instead, I feel like they are treating me like a total idiot. Even doing it in public meetings by "amending" something I say, though we had discussed it just an hour before.
I've only been in my role for a year, and I'm fresh out of grad school. These people know that, they were on the panel when I interviewed. I even heard that they wanted to hire me if my organization didn't! But now, I can barely stand to be in the same room as them. I am constantly questioning myself and my interactions with them, and I don't know what to do. I have tried to talk to my coworkers about this, and they say it's nothing. I feel like they only say that because they haven't had any issues with these people, and they don't have nearly as demanding and intense of a workload as I do.
I keep emphasizing the work load bit because I know it's making me feel quite burned out, and I know that is contributing to my self-esteem. Maybe that is manifesting itself in these interpersonal relationships, but it's getting to be unbearable. I was just with these people for four whole days, and it felt like they were avoiding any conversation with me. I sat directly across from one of them, and not once did they look me in the eye. I work directly with them and report to them, and I am criticizing anything I say, do, or send to them. This last trip was so bad that I thought about quitting. I like my job so I don't want to do that, but I am at a loss with what to do, and my coworkers, my boss, have absolutely no guidance for me.
....And this is where I go to Reddit. I hope I can get some advice here. I've thought about setting up individual meetings with them, but it's so intimidating to do when your coworkers don't even think it's an issue. Many thanks in advance for any wise words you all may have to share.
TLDR: I feel a lot of tension with some clients I work closely with, but no one else seems to think it's a big deal and I don't know what to do to stop feeling this way.
Edit: Just remembered that in a committee meeting we had last week, when talking about staff support, they specifically called out my coworker who is my back-up as I am the project lead, and my coworker hasn't even had to do anything as my back-up yet or even engaged with this committee. I was never mentioned when I was right there at the table and actually talking in the meeting.

This is not going to be a popular post, so I understand if you want to skip it. That being said here is some context...
Me (f 31) have recently reconnected with my sister (f 38). She has recently wanted to rekindle our relationship. Our connection to each other has gone dim since my depression in highschool and her finding her SO aka now wife(f 39). But they recently had a baby approx 2 years ago and family is now important to her. I absolutely greeted the change because I miss her dearly. Her wife and I were in a brief argument about whether or not video games are healthy. My stance is that video game culture has changed greatly since she was 15 (mid 1990s) and has made great improvements and is not nearly as toxic as she believes. However, her stance remains firm that only ugly ,sad losers are interested in such media and will only damage her child's brain (please note this is a hypothetical situation where their child would be interested in videogames when they're older).
I was a little downtrodden and looked to my sister and made the point that my sister was the one to introduce me to videogames and how beneficial they can be. But she denied it ever happened ...but that response really hurt... (SHE SHOWED ME GAMES ON LITERALLY HER SUPER NINTENDO) Even with the game as simple as Mario Kart/World and Donkey Kong. Those were pivotal core memories I have with her that helped define who I am today. I know it sounds silly, but I would watch her every day and admire her problem solving skills. I was in awe of her. I still have her voice in the back of my head today to make decisions, whether it be in a videogame or something bigger, to guide me to make the best choice... But now I'm a little broken.
I don't know if she was being cheeky or serious. Lately she's been denying a lot of things that absolutely happened to fit her current agenda and it drives me mad.
Would IBTAH if I brought this up to her? She has recently changed her stance of what family means since she has had a child, but it feels like she and her wife are guilt tripping us to be more FaMiLy oriented to be free babysitters. I'm not sure how to approach this.

So I'm making a MOSFET slayer exciter circuit which requires a 1k potentiometer to create a voltage divider, but currently i don't have a 1k potentiometer, instead i have a few 10k ones. Is there any way in which i can use the 10k potentiometer instead of the 1k one? Or can I somehow make a voltage divider thata completely eliminates any potentiometers? (I know i can just hook up two resistors and center tap this arrangement but it would be a pain in the ass to tune it). The MOSFET I'm using is IRFZ44N.
Also, if anyone can make the slayer exciter using the IRFZ44N and tell me the exact value of the pot at which the circuit starts resonating, it would be incredible. (I know this is a bit too much to ask for, but if possible to anyone, please do it)

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining. I want my crush to like me. He and I used to be coworkers. We used to work at a fast food restaurant for about a year. I consider myself an attractive woman, and he clearly was attracted to me. However, he thought I was dating another dude at one point, and the week after, started going out with another girl (his sister set them up). They went out for three months. Even if he went out with her as a rebound or attempt to make me jealous, I know he genuinely did like her.
But he still likes me. They’re not seeing each other anymore. Why does he still like me? Especially since yeah I’m good looking and kind, but I could be very ditzy at work. It’s not like I didn’t care, but sometimes I didn’t understand the most basic of instructions. I legit don’t know why he likes me.

Uhhhhh that’s literally what this dude said at a gay men support group I attended today. It was for substance abuse and so I’m not surprised there are some crazy behavior but have you met other gay men that does this?????????
I was pretty shocked that he was even willing to be honest about it but man……that’s fucked up…..he also went on about other ways he’d get revenge for being turned down…… everyone in the room was like “wtf pikachu face”.

It was December 31st, 1999 and we just blew out my first double-digit candles.
My parents moved from Louisiana to inner-city Seattle, this means that I was surprised and kinda shocked to have my birthday party in Graham, in the countryside.
We just blew out my candles. It was 11:50 at night. Everyone was tired and knocked out due to eating ungodly amounts of Southern food that my mother had cooked.
I was laying on a big branch in the forest, not too far from the farm, I just needed to breathe while everyone was asleep. I'm a fast sleeper, so the noises almost carried to Sandman's graces but my mother popped out of nowhere. She was carrying a bundle of fireworks.
My mother was a nice and intiutive woman. They say that women in general have intuition. I just say that insane intuition is an my-mom only type trait. She always knew that I wasn't good with social gatherings and liked to listen to nature...sounds. not be in nature.
My mother climbed on top the giant branch.
She told me a story. A story about the stars.
She told me that the stars in heaven are ghosts. The ghosts always liked to be together and they never really wanted to be too alone.
When we were in the city, we never saw the stars.
I asked my mother, "When we were in Seattle, we don't ever see no stars. Why?"
My mother stopped and started to think. She followed it with, "My child, the stars are people too. Maybe we if saw them in the city where there are lots of people, we would find their most mysterious secrets. Now, they don't want that just like we have secrets we don't wanna tell."
"Mother, that's kinda dumb, what secret might they have that we don't know?"
"My boy, that's a secret only God knows."
We didn't speak for the rest of the night. We just shot fireworks. We didn't see the stars that night. We only saw fireworks as the rainbow explosion covered the sky of Heaven over Earth.
That was the best memory of my mother.
She died in her sleep of a brain aneurysm. Instant Death
When they let me coordinate the funeral, I had the coffin covered in a massive golden leaf star. We put the coffin back in her home in Louisiana.
This happened when I was 15. I spoke to a psychologist, Dr. T, as he was commonly referred to by his other patients due to his facial hair.. Dr. Tallman helped me through my mother's death. This kickstarted my passion for psychological research. Later when I was 25, I was a leading researcher for both psychology and astronomy for astronauts and others that were exposed to bizarre events or circumstances that affected psychological health as well as recording events in outer space.
On April 25th 2018, I was called down to NASA. I had a Level 7, also known as Level Apollyon. I had to move to a military base in Washington in the Rocky Mountains. I was still in a state of confusion. I was called down and I was told to never reveal the secret as it was top-secret classified information.
I walked down to the Solar Observation Room, the room specifically dealing with observation of the sun's inner sound. They said that they had a theory that only the Level 10s, specifically world leaders and leading researchers in the entire world know about.
They said that they are only allowing a certain piece of information to be allowed to Level 7 for researching events that happened concurrently to this revelation.
The stars were alive.
The stars had hearts inside which pumped.
We found them out in 1986, when a satellite, was near the sun and found a crater that showed a beating heart.
The stars were alive
The stars are real
The stars are alive?
I was dumbfounded to say the absolute simple least. The stars however were lately releasing unknown radiation or energy that was affecting Earth, it started happening in West Virginia.
We had multiple messages in 1986 after the sun was discovered as a organism.
"WE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN HERE."
"SLOW DOWN"
"NO LEARNING"
"WOLVES KILL SHEPHARDS"
We have no idea what the hell these messages are talking about.
This was the beginning of the end. We really had no way to going back, we didn't know we were supposed to.
May 29th, 2020, West Virginia.
I was writing down ideas in my notebook for years. Google Doc upon Google Doc filled with theories and explanations.
Known effects on West Virginia have only been tied to West Virginia.
These known effects are: - Merging of human and wildlife. - Carnivorous herbivores. - Raining specifically on cemeteries. - Bizarre lightning related activities around churches
Nothing too wild compared to the events that are happening right now in Seattle, New York, Los Angeles, and Miami.
Special teams called the Flashbangs are sent out after a bizarre event. These use a special gas to make them forget approximately 10 hours. Some civilian who may be immune are euthanized in secret.
The first of these events happened in West Virginia.
At 6:30 PM, the rain had turn from clear to a red color and had started to rise up back into the air in the form of droplets. The water factory in West Virginia had to stop all water after finding out that a third of the water had turned into sheep blood.
The citizens and people at the factory were visited by the Flashbangs.
I landed in Virginia for the second event that happened. It was unusually snowy, it was reported in the forest. I drove on an ATV, alone into the thick wood. The trip was 7-ish minutes until I came up on a meateating doe was feasting a rabbit. The glowing eyes stared into my head.
"YOU ARE STILL LOOKING UP. STOP."
"THIS IS A WARNING"
"HAVE FAITH"
I immediately reported the findings to my superior.
I decided that I needed to breathe. I went to my home in Seattle and took a paid leave.
April 12, 2022
I decided to take around and out of the city for a minute. I was watching the sky as I was driving in my car. The stars were not there. It was just light pollution. I started to crack a smile as the stars begin to pop up as I went further and further away from the city.
I started to think, if the stars were trying to warn us, why didn't they tell the public?
I stopped the car when I looked down and saw another fucking doe.
The neck started contorting into a weird shape, new flesh was growing into the throat of the deer. The deer looked like it was going choke on it's own neck.
"Stop looking up."
It spoke calmly. More calmly than the last doe in West Virginia.
Then more of them showed up.
"Stop looking up, STOP IT."
They went away.
I immediately drew a connection to the stars in the sky.
This may be what I can write at the moment. I need to sleep.
My alcohol is getting low and I don't wanna talk about this. I'm going to speak on this, tomorrow.

my current fp has been one of my closest friends for nearly three years now, but only became my fp a few months ago. we're open with each other about a fair amount of things and i have told them about my bpd and have briefly explained some parts, including what a fp is. however, i've never actually told them that they're my fp.
i want to tell them because i've recently been noticing myself depending on them and internally demanding an impossible amount of attention from them. i've also started falling back into destructive behaviours around (and indirectly because of) them. in other words, they've become a really big trigger for me and i feel awful dragging them into my own shit with no explanation. however, i worry that i might overwhelm them, since they're also fairly dependent and struggling with their own issues.
i'm not sure what i should do, has anyone had a similar experience?

Theres this girl I know who I like, but I'm not sure if she likes me back. Whenever I sit near her she smiles and blushes but I'm not sure if its because she likes me or because shes embarrased that people shipped me with her. Also, in the classes we share, we make eye contact 2-3 times and then she quickly looks away. She also walked up to me the other day and tried to use a pickup line, but I'm not sure if she did it as a joke or if she was being for real. I've texted her before but honestly it feels like she texts me in a different way compared to how she texts with people shes always around.